Flavored coffee

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Why oh why?

Let me clarify, if you want to put flavored creamer into your coffee I think that is perfectly acceptable. However, flavoring the actual coffee grounds seems like weird practice. Mostly because I have now seen some of the strangest combinations of flavors in the office I work in.

I have co-workers who apparently like to try different kinds of flavored coffee. I have mentioned one of these in the past. I have yet come across another completely weird and out of character coffee flavor, at least I think so.

When you think of Death Wish Coffee Company’s coffee you envision an ultra-strong, no frills, no nonsense kind of coffee (at least I do). I have had their original coffee and it was strong and hit the spot. I liked it because it lived up to it’s name.

But, the other day I was at the office coffee maker when I saw someone had use a coffee pod that was a Death Wish Coffee Company’s Pumpkin Chai flavored coffee.

Image. Destoyed. Busted. Deflated.

Frilly, trend-following, wimpy coffee. At least that was what suddenly came across my mind.

I know because I said something to someone about it and magically a pod appeared on my desk later in the day with a note saying to “Try it.”

I did. Opinion not changed. Thankfully the chai flavor was stronger than the pumpkin, but overall wasn’t impressed.

I went out to their website and see that this appears to be the only flavored offereing. Sure, they have other “flavors” but they are more like the original with variations on strength and blends.

Anyway, have you seen this stuff? Tried it? Do you think it holds with the percieved image of the company?

Fury fuel

Trying out something new. I have been playing with the idea for a while and then I thought, “What the hell! I don’t have anything to lose by doing it.”

So, if you click on that Menu button on the upper right of the page, you’ll see a new button to donate via PayPal.

Click on that Menu button!

If you feel led to do so, send me $5 of your hard earned money. I’ll appreciate ever so much!

Just think of it as fuel for my fury.

With just one more cup of coffee I can produce content that will make you think, make you laugh, make you shake your head in disgust, make you see something from a different point of view.

Really. With just $5.

Pretty good deal if you ask me.

Whose fault?

Alright, it’s time to find out who is to blame for this stuff. I analyze software as part of my job, but I have always been an analyst of sorts – even as a history teacher. Now, I am all about “root cause” and, frankly, I wanna know who to blame for the travesty that is grossly flavored coffee beans.

Who wakes up one morning and says, “Ya know, I think I would like some carrot cake coffee.” If you thought that, I call BS. This back of coffee grounds showed up by the community coffee maker and now I have to look at it every time I go to get more coffee. Why are they sharing it with others?

So, who is ultimately to blame for the existence of such crap? Is it the person/company that makes the beans, or is it the consumer who actually spends good money on the final product?

Would you buy this…garbage? If you would, WHY would you? I certainly wouldn’t, as I am sure you can tell by now.

Put a vote in to comments about who is to blame, company or consumer? What other gross flavors have you seen on the store shelves and thought, “WTH?”

Multiplication

food brown nuts snack

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Today’s topic may be one of TMI. I don’t know, really. I am sure there are others out there that suffer the same horrible fate as me, so I doubt there won’t be at least one person who identifies with my plight.

How is it that you can do one thing and it turns into many things?

Math has never been a strong area for me, but I have a rather good grasp of the basic functions. However, the math on this particular subject just doesn’t add up.

Take for instance my love of and consumption of coffee. I really could drink the stuff all day, but there is one serious problem with that. If I drink three cups of coffee and it turns into 9 (+/-) trips to the bathroom. Now I haven’t done a scientific study of my bladder, but the routine is rather ingrained and the carpet at work is beginning to get worn in my path of travel.

How can this be?? Yes, I realize it is a diuretic, or at least that is what they say. But, if that is really the case and it is dehydrating me, why then do I still carry around so much extra liquid? I should be skinny by now!

The math on this is nearly a complete mystery to me on this, 3 = 9.

I have some friends who drink beer like crazy. I think they might actually be dromedaries because they don’t seem to have to pee all the time. Maybe their bladders are just stretched out from practice. Maybe I need to drink my beer to get in shape for drinking more coffee…I could be on to something here…training, that’s what I need!

Anyway, I need to pee so I guess I’ll stop writing now.


 

Anyone else feel like they have a bladder the size of a walnut? 

Red alert!

background conceptual contemporary creativity

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Quick, batten down the hatches! Secure the doors! Turn off the lights and be silent!

No coffee in Cubicalville today and the two cups during the commute are not going to suffice. Plain and simple.

If you have the capability, send coffee QUICK!

**If you tuned in yesterday, you know why this is an emergency and you now know it was not remedied over night. The hero of this story will likely die.**

There will be no joy today. There will be no productive things accomplished. There will be no exceptional customer service today.

There will be grumpiness. There will be pining for coffee. There will be sleepiness. There will be desperation.

OK, I better get off of here and go try to see if I can suck the value out of someone’s used up coffee pod from the garbage. Maybe I can just stuff some of those used coffee grinds in between the gum and cheek…

There will be no spitting today.

Down to the last

caffeine close up coffee coffee cup

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I had an important errand to run over the weekend and forgot all about it. It crossed my mind at least once…there is something I need to do but what is it?

Now, as I sit in my cube this morning getting ready for the day I remembered what I needed to do. It is glaringly obvious at the moment.

I have no coffee creamer and I am down to my last coffee pod.

This is a problem. One that can’t be remedied today.

I can drink coffee black, but I don’t prefer it that way. I know there are lots of people out there who do like it that way, but I look at drinking coffee like a black and white TV – sure, I can watch TV on it but I prefer my picture in color. It’s just better that way. The same goes for coffee.

The real question is, how am I going to make sure there is no coffee crisis in the morning when I return to work. I don’t have time today, or this evening to get coffee pods. This is the real crisis.

I just might die shortly after the start of work tomorrow.

**Old TV announcer style voice: Tune in tomorrow for the next episode to see if our hero survives. Will he make it? Will the forces of evil prevail? Don’t miss tomorrow’s program to find out more.**

About last night

vintage moka espresso coffee pot maker

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It’s a full pot of coffee kinda drinking day.

I am going to venture a guess that not all who needed yesterday’s PSA, actually read it. I say as much since it was well after midnight when the explosions stopped and the dog stopped cowering.

Sleep. It was hard to come by and this poor guy had to get up early, like usual, for work. I am now sitting at my desk and wishing I could just have an IV of coffee. Last night is going to make for a long day at work…

Have a coffee. Have another. And another. Oh, the next one’s on me (if you find me and use the code, “I’ll have a 4th”). I am fixing to have another…and another…and another…

Perk up! It’s another day.

Coffee disaster

professional coffee machine restaurant

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If you have followed the blog long, or gone back and looked at the past writings, you’ve got some idea that I have a need and desire for coffee – and my complaints about the office coffee maker are frequent.

Anyway, I am not too picky when it comes to coffee. Thus, I can drink just about anything. So, at home, if there is leftover coffee in the pot I just make sure the thing comes on early and the coffee is warmed up while I get ready, thus it is hot when I leave for work.

This morning, that first sip of hot coffee on the way out the door was barely lukewarm…I double checked, the pot was one and had been for a little over an hour…so I think maybe the burner on the pot may be going out. This is not a good situation. It may, in fact, be an emergency. I am not panicking yet, but it may come down to that.

Oh, BTW, I drank the lukewarm coffee anyway – because coffee is life!

Now, let’s see about hot coffee from that office coffee maker…

 

Like a wrecking ball

trump-1

Anyone else feel like they hit a wall the moment they left the bed?

The urge to return to the warm confines of the sheets and just melt back into the mattress was very strong this morning.

MONDAY came in like a wrecking ball. It never hit so hard…

*There ya go, get that little ditty outta your head now*

You’re welcome, and unhappy Monday to you too.

Now, where is my intravenous coffee pot?

Just a number

top view photo of ceramic mugs filled with coffees

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Raise your hand if you like coffee. Raise your hand if you have at least two cups of coffee a day. Finally, raise your hand if you have a favorite coffee cup.

Yeah, I thought so. I do too. I like coffee. I have at least two cups of coffee per day. I also have a favorite coffee cup. Well, to be fair, I have a favorite coffee cup at home and also one at work (oh, and include one favorite travel mug as well).

So, I generally use only two coffee cups per day. However, if you are also like me, you probably have a collection of about 63 coffee cups, most of which never get used. Right?

So what’s the deal? Why do people “collect” coffee cups they never (or rarely) use? Moreover, why do people give coffee cups as gifts period? In most cases the giver has to assume the receiver already has a cup they like/use and doesn’t need another cup to clutter up the cupboards. So why give it in the first place? Do you think you are so important that the receiver will give up their favorite cup just for you? Arrogance!

If you go to a coffee shop, you see all the different options there. If you go to a big box store, you see all the options there. If you go to a novelty shop, you see all the options there. Here’s the kicker, if you go to a thrift store you can see the myriad of options there! All those discarded and unwanted coffee cups…

So why do people keep making, selling, buying, and giving them?

What’s your number? How many do you have in the cupboard?