effort | Piss and Moan

Effort less

Posted on December 7, 2022 by backuphill

I’ll preface the entire post with what I don’t want you to think. No, I haven’t misspelled the title. No, I don’t mean “effortless.” That meaning basically means that while doing something it takes little to no effort to complete said something. That’s not what I am referring to.

I am simply stating that I am going to give less effort.

I am going to effort less.

Think of it as not trying hard or giving fewer f*cks.

Think of it as minimal exertion.

I will do everything effort less from here on out.

At least for the foreseeable future, anyway.

Insane or stupid?

Posted on March 31, 2022 by backuphill

Or both?

Conversations recently have me wondering if there is a different between the two. This might not make a whole lot of sense since I won’t be giving all the details (or maybe it will), but it’s got me thinking way harder about the conversations than I probably need to. Sometimes I wonder why I even care.

Generally, people learn or at least have the capability to learn. Some people learn by doing the right thing and having success. Some people learn by doing the wrong thing and having results that are less than successful. Others simply learn by screwing up so badly that they have (seemingly) have no choice but to learn. In any of these three cases, learning is someting that is vital to making headway in life and is a the essence of moving forward with moderate success.

The traditional definition of stupid is easy to understand. We usually associate lack of common sense, intelligence, discernment, etc. with being stupid.

Can you become not stupid? I would like to think so. I believe that is where learning enters in. If you learn from the results of being stupid, you should in fact be less stupid because you would alter your behavior or choices or thinking or reasoning or actions or whatever in order to not repeat the same stupidity. If you didn’t have common sense before, mistakes (even if a made a couple times) should help you learn from them and eventually you should have…common sense, thus making wiser and smarter choices going forward.

But. BUT…there is always a but…

The traditional definition of insane is fairly easy to understand as well. However, there is another definition that sometimes gets referred to as the definition of insanity – “Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.” This definition has been attributed to Albert Einstein and Ben Franklin, though it appears that neither actually said it. However, for our little discussion today it fits rather nicely no matter who said it. If you continually do the same thing, the same actions, the same approach, think the same thoughts, and you don’t get a different result, then you must be insane. At least it seems that way. But are they really insane or just stupid?

Can you “unlearn” insanity? There may be a debate about that. I tend to lean towards, no, but then with treatment (and maybe drugs) I guess maybe that is something that can be unlearned. But that might not actually be learning so much as adjustment.

Can you “unlearn” stupidity? Most definitely.

So why are there so many people who refuse to unlearn their stupidity and just act like they are insane?

Conversations as of late make it difficult to tell the difference and certain perplex the hell out of me because it makes so much common sense to me, but they fail to see it.

Maybe I am the insane one…for continually hoping they unlearn their stupidity…

17+1

Posted on July 29, 2020 by backuphill

NOT MY FAMILY – Photo by fauxels on Pexels.com

I took the day off yesterday, from work and blogging.

Family is in town from out of town, so yesterday was when everyone could get together at the same time.

It was actually kind of a big deal, since most of the time people are uncooperative and typically chaos ensues as the planning and execution of said plans happens.

So, 17+1 all managed to make it to another part of the state and gather in a sort of “family reunion” type gathering. 17+1? Well, there were 17 people, plus one on the way.

Family? My wife and I, our combined 6 children, 2 of their spouses and a significant other, and 6 grandchildren (plus the one on the way).

Picnic lunch, visiting shops and stores amid a pandemic and ridiculous restrictions, ice creams stops, and lots of driving (about 6 hours round trip). So, as you can imagine, there are always a bit of wrangling issues when you have people in your group from ages of 53 to 2. But, for the most part, it was a memorable time.

Granted, these are the people that a large portion of the topics here on the blog deal with, but yesterday they were all exempt. Genuine effort by all made for a day that was mostly pleasant.

So, today, while I don’t feel like Pissing and Moaning, I guess I’ll just be appreciative.

Loud and clear

Posted on June 23, 2020 by backuphill

Photo by Download a pic Donate a buck! ^ on Pexels.com

You ever feel like you are under-appreciated?

We just passed a holiday of sorts – Father’s Day.

I remembered my dads. I have three (dad and two FILs). It’s an easy thing to do, right? Talk to one, remember the others. Acknowledge them, appreciate them, take time out of your day to help them feel special for a moment. Doesn’t take a long time, but it is important.

Now, background here…I married into a lot of kids the second time around. Most of them adults by the time they came into my life. So now, including spouses of the kids who are married, there are eight.

Could of days ago, I heard from three.

That’s it. Three.

Didn’t hear a peep from 5 of the 8. There haven’t even been any “after the fact” acknowledgements either.

So, now full disclosure, you know the source of a LOT of the Piss and Moan material.

I try to deny the fact and ignore it, but there just isn’t any denying it.

Look, I realize they have another dad. I haven’t ever expected to be the top of the list. But at the very least acknowledged? Yes.

I am not looking for anything fancy, lord knows that most of them can’t afford crap (see other, numerous, posts about adult children living in our house or on our property). But it doesn’t take much to make someone feel appreciated, right?

Is it wrong for me to feel this way?

Tag-alongs

Posted on May 7, 2020 by backuphill

Photo by Skitterphoto on Pexels.com

Nope. I’m not talking about small, over-priced cookies distributed by your little local vested gang…

I am talking about family members (adult children, really) who don’t ever make any plans on their own, but just “tag-along” on the plans of others.

Birthday parties, Thanksgiving, Mother’s/Father’s Day, etc…never their own plans, always the question that comes one of two ways, “What are the plans?” or “What are you doing?”

Both of those questions are then followed up by the assumption that they are automatically invited to the event (even if it doesn’t really involve them) and don’t have to put in any effort into it. Sure, sometimes they offer to bring something minimal but most of the time they just show up and consume with little to no appreciation.

I have watched from afar and up close and personal, so here’s an example of which I speak:

Mother’s Day planning is done for an elderly mother. Plans are made, set, decided upon, and food is purchased for said get together. Planning has been done by the child of this mother BUT what soon follows is the children (the adult grandchildren of the elderly mother) of said mother doing the planning don’t plan anything for their own mom. Instead, the children just horn in on the plans for the grandmother – they don’t make any effort to plan anything for their own mother, other than just going to the gathering for the grandmother.

Does that make sense? I tried to explain that as clearly as possible, but I am not sure I did it successfully.

Anyway, this kind of tag-along thing happens all the time and, quite frankly, the mother needs to say something about it but doesn’t have the heart to speak up and tell the kids they need to do their own planning.

Of course, I can’t speak up either because that is a battle I can’t win no matter how I approach it. I am sure you can assume you know how that would all go over.

Irritating, really. And all I can do is sit back and watch it happen…

Unsolicited Advice? If you have are an adult child with parents who are still around, make your damn own plans! That might be challenging depending on family situations and timing, but the effort is noticed and appreciated. DON’T just tag-along (even if you are invited to). Grow up, be responsible, and truly appreciate your parents instead of just relying on them.

Extra effort

Posted on May 4, 2020 by backuphill

elderly gentleman making silence gesture in studio

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

So, I have a colleague that likes to take the extra effort to prove herself correct.

Well, “correct” is actually subjective in this case because there are always different ways to go about things in software. Another one of those weird cliche sayings, “There’s more than one way to skin a cat.”

Anyway, she didn’t like that someone other than her had found another way in the software to do something we all thought wasn’t possible at first. She found the first solution and she crowed loudly. As we began to dig in, another colleague and I found another way to do it and when we brought that to the attention of everyone on the team she protested that it wasn’t a viable way to do it.

Well, she now has spent all weekend (unpaid time) to prove that she was correct, to a degree. That her method was the bet way and there really shouldn’t be any other method used.

OK, whatever.

I’m not going to get into it. You can have your silly little victory, but we all know there is more than one way to do it. My ego isn’t that big that I have to be right.

Anyone else have a co-worker that is like this? Has to be right at all costs, doesn’t like it when you show them there are alternative ways to do things?

Isn’t worth the trouble

Posted on March 19, 2019 by backuphill

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Some things in life just aren’t worth it. Surprisingly, there are actually some foods that just aren’t worth it, which is weird to say because I am kind of a professional eater – I’ve been doing it since I was little.

One food that is a real pain in the rear to eat is an orange. I’ve known this for a long time but I thought I would give it another try. I mean, they’re sweet and they’re juicy so that makes them really tempting. But, I tell you, as soon as I started peeling the dang thing I instantly regretted starting. Now it’s leaking juice all over my hands and I’m getting stick and my hands are wet and the peel is just not coming off easily…Oh, I prevailed and ate the dang thing, but I had to have a co-worker lock my computer so I could go wash up after seemingly taking a bath in orange juice. Then it hit me – the peel on an orange just doesn’t make trying to enjoy the fruit enjoyable. So, CONFIRMED, an orange isn’t worth the trouble.

Another food that isn’t worth the trouble? Crab. Good grief you need a damn tool to even access the minuscule amount of meat housed inside that ocean floor scrounger. I don’t even really like crab (it eats garbage off the ocean floor) so the work required for minimal reward just isn’t worth the trouble. I think you can probably put lobster and shrimp in the same category. CONFIRMED.

If you have to work to eat it, it just isn’t worth it. Plain and simple.

What do you think? Are there any other foods that just aren’t worth the trouble because they require too much work before you get to enjoy it?

Choices vs. Choices

Posted on February 7, 2019 by backuphill

There are days were choices are just hard. It’s always this versus that. Me versus them. Us versus them. Me versus that.

So today, the choices seemed harder than most days:

Get up, work out, have a fabulous body (some day, because it isn’t right now).

Stay in the warm, comfy bed and sleep more.

Effort and exertion versus rest, comfort, and warmth.

Dang it.

Fine.

I got up.

But I hated it.

Stupid choices.

Why can’t we just have both?

Choices suck.