Up here in the PNW we have trees. Lots of them. They’re everywhere. Well, mostly everywhere. There are places that have a shortage of trees, but don’t feel sorry for them. Feel sorry for me. Please. Like right now. Feel it.

Right now I would like to cut down all my trees. I don’t really need them and I don’t really have a use for them. They’re really more of a pain really.

I think I have talked about one aspect of the pain on the blog already, pine needles. I think I also mentioned in another post about trees and their freaking leaves falling in the yard too. BUT there is another aspect of pain that I haven’t yet mentioned when it comes to my trees.

Pine cones.

No, not the great big ones with pokey things on them that smell like cinnamon that you can buy at Michael’s or Hobby Lobby or JoAnn Fabrics during Christmas time. While I am sure those are an issue for someone somewhere, they aren’t my issue.

My pine cones are from the Douglas Fir trees in the yard. (see the photo at the top) These stupid trees produce (seemingly) millions of pine cones every year and then during the winter months they shed them all over my freaking yard. When spring comes and it is time to mow the yard, these pine cones are in varying degrees of opening (so some are “soft” – meaning opened, and some are hard as rocks because they are wet and closed).

It takes time to pick these things up, bent over for hours scouring the ground to find them all (used to bride the kids to do it for money – one year they picked up 40 gallons [8 5-gallon buckets] of them). The kids are old enough now they aren’t going to fall for Dollar Store trinkets any longer.

So, rather than pick them up this year, I just decided to try and mow over them. Oh man the racket!! It was like mowing rocks.

So, between the pine needles and pine cones and sap from some of the trees, and falling leaves from some of the other trees, and moss all over the yard – yeah, this place is a modern day paradise for landscaping nightmares.

#smh