Entertainment

Headline spoilers

Posted on by backuphill

voice spoiler

Thanks a lot, HuffPost!

Not only are you a hack news outlet, but you are also the jackwagon news outlet that chose to post a headline spoiler for “The Voice” the morning after the finale. Look at the other headlines. Any of those have a spoiler in them? NOPE!

I am still gonna watch The Voice finale, but I am irritated that this stupid gossip rag doesn’t have enough sense to keep the spoilers out of the headlines. I bet they also published that Santa and the Easter bunny weren’t real either….

Ever had something spoiled because you looked at the news?

A case of the drops

Posted on by backuphill

close up photography of people picking nachos chips

Photo by Raizza Videña on Pexels.com

No, that isn’t some sort of new disease and it isn’t some kind of euphemism for diarrhea. I am not even referring to what football receivers get once in a while in their careers. In this case it refers to a really annoying occurrence of dining out.

I am sure you have experienced it at one time or another, but it’s what I like to call the times when food just can’t seem to make it to my mouth (or I miss it all together) and it ends up down the front of me…on my shirt, my jacket, my tie, my pants…”the drops.”

I can hear you yelling now, “Oh, man! I hate that!”

Last night I visited a local establishment just because I could and because I wanted to. Maybe my motivations were bad and I ended up paying the angry food gods because the case of the drops started almost immediately.

Chips and salsa, meet shirt and pants.

Chips, meet shirt.

Sour cream, meet shirt.

Guacamole, meet shirt and pants.

I swear, it has never been that bad before. Maybe I just wasn’t leaning over my plate enough. Maybe I just got really weak chips for dipping. Maybe the gods are angry with me for wanting nachos. Who knows!?! All I know is that my food spent as much time on my fork or in my fingers as it did on my clothing.

Good grief. Maybe I shouldn’t be allowed in public. Do you suppose they deliver nachos? That way I can just eat naked in the shower and hose myself off when I am done (sorry for that picture).

Got any messy food stories? What’s the best (and by best, I mean worst) instance of the drops have you had?

Magical calories

Posted on by backuphill

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You know, math is hard. I really think very few people like it. I suspect many of my readers are probably in the same boat as I am when it comes to math. You’d just rather not do it. Sometimes, I just don’t get it. This, however, seems to be simple math and since I am no math prodigy I think I can handle it.

The label on this bottle of carbonated and flavored water is a mathematical mind-bender. Or, perhaps someone just doesn’t have any labeling sense. Or, maybe, they’re just magical calories!

There are three servings in the 36 oz. bottle (12 oz. per serving). According to the way I read this, if you drink one serving at a time, there are ZERO calories. However, if you drink the bottle all at once (or over time?) you will get a whopping 15 calories . Duly noted. Don’t consume the entire bottle. Ever. You will avoid all calories if you leave one ounce in the bottle.

But wait!! There is something funny going on here. It just doesn’t add up. If there are three servings for a total of 15 calories, how does the math break down to ZERO calories per serving? Wouldn’t that be 5 calories per serving?

Anyone else confused by this math?

Do I really want an answer? NO! How about we just apply those magical calories to pizza? I am thinking, ZERO calories per slice and only 80 calories if you eat the whole thing. That would be satisfying.

Have you ever run into a dieting math problem that didn’t make sense?

Did you hear that?

Posted on by backuphill

man using smartphone while sitting at the table

Photo by bruce mars on Pexels.com

Did you hear that? I am surprised if you didn’t.

It was loud.

Or maybe it was just loud because it was in my confined space.

What what is?

It was the sound of my head hitting my desk.

No, I wasn’t under it looking for the Cheez-it I dropped.

It was my head hitting the desk out of boredom.

I say boredom, but really I have a ton of things to do. I have a ton of things to do, but this particular task of software testing and verification is tedious and boring. Staring at the screens all day and very little movement has left me rather sleepy.

I have other tasks that would be much more interesting and stimulating. However, this particular task I have put off longer than I should so I am plowing my way through it. I am only about half way done. Ugh!

I have a feeling my head will have a few extra lumps on it when I am done. How many bounces will my noggin take off the desk? Care to take any bets?

Do you have a task at work that is tedious, boring, and positively mind-numbing?

Old curmudgeon

Posted on by backuphill

basket colourful decoration easter

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Maybe I really don’t have a heart. Maybe it is just a dark spot in my chest. A black hole of emotion, if you will.

I am sure you are all aware it was Easter over the weekend. There are two sides to the holiday – a Christian celebration or the commercialized side. Most people pick one or the other, or there is some kind of mingling of the two.

Sometimes celebrations bring out the curmudgeon in me. I don’t know why. It just does.

As I was wandering the yard and the grandkids, nieces, and nephews were hunting for candy and change filled plastic eggs I realized this is a really stupid practice. The whole dying eggs, or filling plastic ones, hiding them (or dropping them in plain sight) and then “finding” them – what a dumb ritual.

OK, I can hear the groans and eye rolls from here. “C’mon, it’s fun for the littles!”you say. It might be and their smiles might be a sign of the enjoyment. But I still don’t like it or enjoy it. I did it for my daughter when she was really little, but I didn’t especially enjoy it.

I know. I am an old, un-fun fogey. A grump. A curmudgeon.

Anyone else have a strong dislike for this Easter Egg hunt thing?

I can do without

Posted on by backuphill

beautiful bloom blooming blossom

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

There is an old saying out there…”April showers bring May flowers.”

Yeah, I could do without the flowers. Just saying.

Wet, wet, and more wet.

Does it rain a lot in Washington? That is a question I get a lot when I travel and people find out where I am from. Yes. It rains a lot.

I don’t need flowers. I don’t even really need May.

Let’s just get to summer already.

Hey, I’m driving here!

Posted on by backuphill

person holding red umbrella walking on street

Photo by Deva Darshan on Pexels.com

I sure hope you aren’t one of these people. I hope you aren’t a rude slow poke.

I’ll venture a guess you have experienced this though…

You enter a parking lot and proceed to look for a parking space. In the time that you are slowly driving around looking for a space, you inevitably encounter people who have exited the store, or perhaps are even headed into the store, and are walking right down the middle of the “road.” Thus, blocking you from moving any further as you wait for them to move.

Sometimes there are multiple people, walking shoulder to shoulder, creating a line across the roadway and preventing you from passing. They are oblivious to others around them, just walking and talking, taking their sweet time as your crawl at a snail’s pace, if you can move at all.

Rude? You bet! Frustrating? Of course. Wanna run over them? OK, keep that one to yourself as sometimes silence is the best policy…

GET.OUT.OF.THE.WAY!

Really, it’s not like I am in a hurry. In most cases, I am patient and can wait. But it is the principle of the thing – let’s not just be concerned with ourselves, shall we?

What are your parking lot pet peeves? Do you have bad habits you are can admit?

Can’t hear you

Posted on by backuphill

fried meat beside sliced lemon and white mustard

Photo by Valeria Boltneva on Pexels.com

We are an entertainment society, as in we all want to be entertained all the time. Look at our culture. We carry around computers in our hands that are used for some communication, but mostly for entertainment.

It comes in various forms, but usually there is some kind of entertainment even when you go out to eat. TVs on the wall. Touch pads of some sort on the table. Music playing overhead. A live band. You are likely to find at least one of these forms of entertainment in a dining establishment near you.

The other day I was out to eat at a place and the music was so loud (not a band, just overhead) that I couldn’t talk with the person across the table from me. It felt like we had to shout at each other just to tell the other person we couldn’t hear what they were saying because of the music.

We probably should have left, but instead endured the abuse of our ears while we ate.

Maybe I am just getting old, though I don’t think it is that. I like loud music, but there is a time and place for it. When it comes to being social with others I don’t think music blaring is an appropriate time to give the speakers a workout. Most people like to visit while they eat.

So, is this becoming common practice these days? I noticed a while back while out with my family as well, though it wasn’t as bad as the last place it was still rather annoying.

Friends, what do you know about this? Are you similarly annoyed by the rising volume of music in restaurants?

Little dog, little dog

Posted on by backuphill

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Oh, little dog, little dog…

You are a tricky one you little dog. You are a little thief, little dog.

You steal my spot on the couch. You steal my pillow on the bed.

You sit at my feet and wait to steal (ok, willingly given up because you’re cute) pieces of my food.

You, little dog, steal cuddles in the middle of the day and make me pause in the rush as if to say, “Slow down. It will be OK. Take a moment and love me.”

Yes, little dog, you have stolen my heart, which is actually quite remarkable considering three years ago I DID NOT want you to be in my house, much less my life. But, you have been good for everyone.

Do I like that you steal my pillow at night? NO. Do I like that you drool all over it the moment I get out of bed and you curl up on it? No. Do I like that you often displace my butt from the couch the moment I get up to get a drink? No. I don’t like sitting in places that are not comfortable and unfamiliar.

But, little dog, oh little dog…keep it up.

**There may have been too much love and only a little Piss & Moan in this post. I apologize and will try to get back to the regularly schedule loathing tomorrow.**

 

Blink of an eye

Posted on by backuphill

lioness lying on brown tree trunk

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

It was nice here in the Pacific Northwest this weekend. It got up into the 60s and there were lots of people out without coats and washing their cars. I happen to have been one of them!

When the weather turns nice (and yes, in the NW 60s is nice) it is time to get out and work in the yard, getting ready for Spring. So, the weekend was a weekend to get off the couch and cast away the sluggish attitude to “get ‘r done!”

Well, I got her done. And I am paying for it this morning. All that activity made this old guy stiff and tired.

You know that feeling when your tired and you just want to stay in bed? Yeah, I got that this morning, but really the issue here today is that time that goes by in the blink of an eye.

Literally, as I was driving to work this morning, I think I could count the seconds go by with each blink of the eye. There was literally time in each blink to think, “It feels good to close my eyes. Wait, I’m driving, open back up.” Then the next blink comes, “Why did I get out of bed? Do I really have to do this?” The next blink, “It would be nice to just leave them closed. Why are they so heavy? Open, open, open…” And so on…It was a really long drive to work this morning.

Anyway, here’s to a slow-brained, slow-blinking kind of day…oh Monday…