Family | Piss and Moan

Temperature control

Posted on November 13, 2018 by backuphill

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Too hot. Too cold. Too hot. Too cold. Too hot. Too cold. Too hot. Too cold. Too hot.

The battle has begun.

It’s the “I’m too hot” and “I’m too cold” season. The season where your body can’t decide what it’s going to do so you spend lots of time trying to find the perfect temperature.

It’s cold outside, turn up the heat or build a fire. Now it’s too hot inside but too cold outside.

It’s cold outside, so bundle up to keep warm. Now you have too many layers on but you’re afraid if you take them off you’ll get cold so you don’t remove them only to stay too hot.

It’s cold in the house, so you add more blankets to the bed. Now you wake up in the middle of the night sweating. You throw them off, only to wake up shortly thereafter to pull them back up because you’re cold.

The office is cold but you don’t want to wear your coat while you work. You wear your coat while you work and then you’re too hot.

See? Constant battle. Push-pull. Hot-cold. Happy-miserable.

Clicking of the body clock

Posted on November 12, 2018 by backuphill

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So, yeah, there was a holiday in the US yesterday. It was Veteran’s Day (thanks vets for all you have done and do) and so today is a day off from work.

However, the body clock does not know it’s a day off so it promptly woke me at the normal time as if it were a usual work day. Thanks internal body clock, I didn’t need that.

As such, I have obliged the body with normal coffee consumption but perhaps the only redeeming factor in the early wake on a holiday is that I can take a nap later in the day. But, I would just rather be sleeping now.

#smh

Dust much?

Posted on November 7, 2018 by backuphill

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Who the hell is supposed to dust around here?

Anyone else have this problem? You know, the one where you wake up one day and there seems to be a layer of dust on everything?

At work, there is a cleaning crew and I would assume they are supposed to dust, but apparently not. I can understand not dusting the inner portions of shelving and whatnot, I don’t expect that every nook and cranny be dusted. But do you think you could maybe run a cloth across the top of the book shelf once in a while? I mean, serious, it doesn’t have anything on top of it!

Seriously folks, there is enough dust on top of the shelf to qualify as an indoor, organic planter.

I’ll take care of my home, but I don’t expect to have to do it at work too.

Fall colors = a close simulation of hell

Posted on November 2, 2018 by backuphill

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“Ooh they’re so pretty!”

“I just love fall. Crisp air and all the pretty colors on the trees.”

…said no one ever! Well, at least by someone who has the major task of raking all that “pretty fall color” out of their yard. Or, if you are in the Northwest, there is the forever piles of pine needles clogging up everything in sight! Sheesh.

As long as the days are dry and the weather is moderately mild, you can cheat and blow them outta the yard into your neighbor’s yard fairly easily. Once it get wet, as in rain, you need a freaking jet engine to blow them things loose.

So, if you don’t (or can’t) stay on top of the task, you are left raking – back busting, blister inducing, getting all wet and cold hell. After hours of sweating and bagging, you can see the lawn. And then the next wind storm comes and the process starts all over again. Welcome to fall hell…

Trees suck. We should cut them all down.

Just 6″ please!

Posted on November 1, 2018 by backuphill

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One thing I have wished for all my life is six inches. I just want six more inches!

There are a lot of things that are inconvenient in life when you are short. 5’4″ is kinda short. Hey, I can’t help it, I have short parents too.

Anyway, six inches would go a long way in solving a lot of problems. First, it would put me a couple inches above the height of average American males, but it wouldn’t make me too tall (not that that is really an issue, I guess). Second, I could reach the top shelf of the cupboards without having to get out something to stand on. Third, I could easily find pants that fit.

Oh yeah, that last one is a big one, let me tell you! Being stalky is no day at the park, I have to say. Either the waist is too big, the legs too short, or the thighs and calves too tight. So, I have to make compromises. Purchased pants usually are too long and I either wear them that way (cuz they do shrink a little) or I have them hemmed (good luck trying to find people that do that these days).

Anyway, being short sucks. So, I’ll keep hoping I wake up 6″ taller some day. Or, hey, if you think about it, how about shooting up a prayer or two for me? You just never know, maybe someone will finally get the hint. Or, we’re getting into Santa season, maybe I’ll find some height in my stocking. What do you think Santa? Got my back on that one?

I didn’t think so.

#smh

Dremel Multi-Max anything but max

Posted on October 29, 2018 by backuphill

Don’t you hate it when things just stop working? Yeah, me too.

I received this thing as a gift for my birthday one year. It didn’t get used for about three months and then it got used whole working on a remodel of a birthday. It was a helpful too, except when it wasn’t working.

Right from the start there was something wrong with the variable speed switch. Shake it, smack it with the ball of your hand, hold it just right and it would work. Finally I resorted to jamming a small shim into the switch area and it worked great at full speed. The problem was the shim couldn’t stay there forever since the tool obviously wasn’t designed to work that way. Total time in use, maybe an hour when all said and done?

The project ended and it got stored away. As you can see, it didn’t get abused or anything of the sort.

I dug it out to use it the other day. Doesn’t work at all now. Dead. Removed the shim, nothing. Put the shim back in, nothing. Now what? Obviously it is out of the warranty period. Totally disappointing it doesn’t work.

So, who’s the tool now? Dremel or me?

The phone call we all dread

Posted on October 24, 2018 by backuphill

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Yep, it happened. I got the call we all dread over the last weekend. The one that you just wish you didn’t answer the phone. The one that makes you regret getting up in the morning.

“Hi, it’s your sis. Are you available next weekend? We are gonna move and need some help.”

And there it is…yes, you are free and no you don’t want to help. You don’t want to help because moving sucks, always. It is no fun moving yourself, let alone someone else. So, no, I am not free and no I don’t want to help.

“Yeah, I am free. What time do you need me to be there?”

Damn it! That isn’t what I was going to say. Stupid family relations. So you go help.

While you’re there and after having moved stuff all day, your mom says, “While I have you all together, can you do me a favor? After we’re done here, can you all come over to the house and move the piano out of the house? Someone is coming to pick it up.”

Are you serious, mom? We just spend all day moving someone else’s crap and now we gotta go move a piano? I swore off moving pianos the last time I moved a piano. I am NOT doing it this time.

I hate being a good family member. 2500 pounds of piano later…I need pain killer.

New car clean

Posted on October 23, 2018 by backuphill

automobiles automotives black and white black and white

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You know how bright and shiny that car looked when it came off the lot? You know, sparkling, dust free interior, the chromy parts chroming, and the black plastic on the outside hasn’t started to fade to gray…

Is it ever like that again? I mean for a BRAND SPANKING NEW CAR?

Probably not. I don’t have time to wash it daily and I don’t have time to clean the inside on even a weekly basis…so it gets dirty, like the car I just got rid of. That old car rarely got washed and rarely got cleaned on the inside. I mean, it was old, so who cares, right?

But this new car…can I just put a bubble around it?

All I want is for it to stay clean!

Is this what Hell looks like?

Posted on October 22, 2018 by backuphill

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I think I was being punished yesterday.

Why, you ask?

I attempted what no rational adult should attempt.

I went shopping at IKEA with kids. OK, there, I said it. I have known it for a while but I am irrational.

It is a HUGE mistake to take your kids shopping with you at IKEA. They whine. They complain. They constantly have to be taken to the bathroom. They touch things. They run around. All while you are slowly losing your mind and repeating yourself incessantly. Yes, they do have a “play area” for kids. BUT, get this…apparently there are so many rules that few kids even qualify. And if they do, they can only stay there for an hour. Yeah, you read that right, AN HOUR!! It take like three hours just to walk through the store, let alone try and shop.

No rational conversations can be had. No decisions can be made.

All you wanna do when you’re done at the place is smash your head against something hard until you pass out. Yes, that must be what Hell will be like…eternally shopping with your kids.

Here’s an IDEA…IKEA should be a kid free zone.

Don’t make me carve another

Posted on October 19, 2018 by backuphill

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Yeah, it’s THAT time of year again. I already mentioned one of the terrible things we have to enjoy during this season, but there is another similarly related item.

Pumpkin carving. Ugh…

I am sure I enjoyed it to some degree when I was a kid, and yes there is a degree of “tradition” involved. The whole trip tot he patch and walking in the mud and getting hot cider, etc. I get it.

But these days, I could care less. I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to help the kids do it. I don’t want to help the grandkids do it. I don’t want to do it. You can’t make me do it.

There I said it.

Yes, I am heartless. The Grinch is my spirit animal. Always.