Work

Hail (to) the garbageman

Posted on by backuphill

scrap metal trash litter scrapyard

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If you are a home owner, you have probably done this at least once. My guess is probably more than once. What is it, you ask?

It looks a little like this…

You’re laying in bad dead asleep. Blissfully not a care in the world when you are awakened by a familiar noise. You listen for a second and then realize that familiar noise is the garbage truck up the street. IT. IS. GARBAGE.DAY. and you forgot to put out the can(s)!

So, you bolt from bed, desperately trying to clothe yourself (or maybe not, if you’re that kind of person) and put on some sort of foot covering as you awkwardly and progressively work your way through the house to the cans that need to be taken to the street.

Now, if you are quick, hopefully you made it to the street before the truck comes rambling up to scoop up your cans as you stand there in the driveway or next to the road, disheveled like you just randomly dressed in clothes you found in the dumpster behind the thrift store. But if you are not…well, my friend, you are just SOL.

Maybe, just maybe, you get lucky and make eye contact with the garbage collection officer and he acknowledges you and comes back to empty your can. That is a glorious day and the victory feels like you should just stop there for the day and not risk further misfortune.

But if you are not that lucky, you get the walk of shame with a full can and another week of stinky garbage. You might as well crawl in the can and wait. There is no coming back from this defeat.

So, don’t be that guy. Get the garbage out and hail to the garbageman.

The Office Donut

Posted on by backuphill

donuts and bagel display

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There they are, staring at me like a cat about to eat the canary.

It feels weird to complain about donuts, but dang it already I am going to.

I don’t need these. It is December, the month of Christmas treats everywhere.

I have no will power.

Stupid donuts.

Guess I’ll eat as many as possible so they stop staring at me.

Time, not my friend

Posted on by backuphill

pexels-photo-1447235.jpeg

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You know when you have stuff to do at work and there just isn’t any time? Yeah, that’s me today and all of next week.

People are sick, so you have to cover them. People need to get hired, so you cover jobs they would normally be responsible for. People are gone giving training or getting training, so you have to cover them. It’s a wonder I have time for my own job!

I have to give training next week and so far I have had less than an hour to prepare. The prospect of time today, is next to nil. The prospect of time next week is just above nil.

Guess I’ll wing it, like usual.

Home office chills

Posted on by backuphill

photo of person covered with brown textile

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My job allows me to telecommute two days a week and let me tell you that I am gonna take advantage of that in any way possible since I have to drive through the worst traffic in the US, to the tune of 45 miles one way to work. So, having the chance to telecommute is not going to go untakenadvantageof (yes I know that word is made up, but it should be a real word).

Anyway, the disadvantage to my telecommute at this point is that the house is too small to have my “home office” actually in the home, which means it is currently set up in my garage. It isn’t a totally bad deal except…

…except the garage isn’t completely insulated and on rare occasions the temperature of the upper left corner of the contiguous 48 actually dips below freezing. As such, the “home office” gets rather chilly. This morning the “home office” was 41 degrees before turning on the heater and when I started working, over an hour later, it was 46 degrees.

My “home office” requires a continually running heater and a stocking cap. And a perpetually warm cup of coffee for the hands.

Oh the sacrifices I make to work from home.

Babysitting co-workers

Posted on by backuphill

Tasked this morning with babysitting co-workers who have difficulty getting along…and they are the ones presenting a workshop today.

Last minute assignment from the boss. Up way too early for this.

This should be interesting.

I need staples…

Posted on by backuphill

black and white blur business conceptual

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The supply cabinet at the office should do the trick. No, I am not stealing from the office for my stapler at home. These are for my actual work stapler.

Here’s the thing. The office supplies are ordered from an office supply store named “Staples.” Guess what? They have store branded items! Great if you are buying office supplies and want something cheaper than the name brand stuff. Perfect solution.

But wait! What happens when you go to the supply closet/cabinet and open it up looking for staples? Yep. Sure. OK. There are fifty small boxes in the cabinet all with the work “Staples” on them…now I am supposed to look for a box labeled Staples Staples?

Good luck to me. Maybe I didn’t really need staples that badly.

#fml #smh

Shut up already!

Posted on by backuphill

Every office has at least one. Every school faculty has one too. I am sure every factory has one, I just haven’t worked in one. To be fair, it is probably true of just about every place of employment around the world.

What is that, you ask? The only co-worker that asks a question at the end of a staff meeting that makes the meeting go unnecessarily long. Am I right?

Can I ask one more question? Can I get some clarification on…? Would it be ok…? Why…?

The questions come in all shapes and sizes but what we all know is that the question could have been addressed in a private conversation or in a covered in an email. But instead, we are left sitting in a meeting we didn’t want to be in in the first place listening to people we don’t like or marginally tolerate ask questions we already know the answer to or don’t care to know.

Just shut up already and let us get back to work! Please stop the torture.

#smh

When you go just too far

Posted on by backuphill

We’ve all had those moments, right? The one where we try to squeeze out the most of something just so we can enjoy more of it? Yeah, me too.

This morning, again, I tried to squeeze (maybe that is the wrong word here) too much coffee into my cup. And, again, it overflowed because it was just too much.

I have a coffee mug that I like and usually can get 14 ounces of coffee into, if I am careful about the amount of creamer I put in first. As such, when I am not paying attention and try to fill the cup “to the rim” (as an old coffee brand – Brim – used to say) I end up having to clean the coffee maker and surrounding area because of spillage. 

I say it is the fault of the coffee maker because it isn’t dispensing the correct amount of water. It’s a Keurig and I have been filling my cup the same way for over a year but suddenly I get an over-fill on a pretty regular basis. It can’t be my fault!

Ok, maybe it is…maybe I should just stop pressing my luck and stop trying to “enjoy the last drop.”

#fml

Can we just take a nap now?

Posted on by backuphill

Going back to work after a long (4 days, in my case) weekend is just punishment no one should have to endure. How about if you all continue to work and I’ll just take a permanent retirement where I still collect my paycheck? 

Yeah, I think that sounds good. 

It’s only 15 minutes into the work day and I can tell it is going to be a long day already…

#smh

Sorta Thankful

Posted on by backuphill

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I was at the store last evening picking up a last minute item needed by someone in the house to make something to put in my mouth today. The place was packed and the cash registers were beeping like crazy.

The young man behind the counter checking me out wished me a “Happy Thanksgiving” and I returned the sentiment. And then I added, “I hope you don’t have to work tomorrow.” His response irritated me, though it was really no fault of his own. 

You see, he has to work today, at a grocery store, on Thanksgiving. That is the totally irritating part! The poor kid will spend at least half of his day working instead of being with family or friends, all because we as a society are too damn selfish to let people stay home.

You know what they used to do if they forgot the olives, or cranberries, or whatever? THEY WENT WITHOUT and made due with what they did have! No stores were open and everyone survived without whatever was missing. Because, really, did they need it that bad?

No one was working (well, except for first responders – and we’ll talk about that in a second). Why have we become a society of consumers and “me first”? It really is all our (me included, though I have made great effort over the years not to be) fault. We have made this mess.

Anyway, there are people working today which I suppose is a necessary evil. First responders (fire, police, hospital, ambulance, etc) are all on the job today keeping people safe or saving people. I am thankful for them. They sacrifice for us and that we should be grateful for.

So, Piss and Moan is sorta thankful today…is it possible to be only partially thankful and still not be an ass? Eh, who cares. Happy Thanksgiving.