Alright, if you are one of these people, I will not be apologizing for my attitude this morning.

If you are one of those people that has to ride on the back bumper, climb inside the tailpipe, or (a more generic term) tailgate – I really don’t like you.

I mean I REALLY don’t like you. You are a straight up jackwagon.

Do you think the world revolves around you? Do you think you are so important that you feel the need to try to push people out of your way? Do you think you are so high and mighty that you would risk causing an accident, or worse – hurting people, just so you can get somewhere faster?

Let’s be real. You aren’t going to push me out of the way. You aren’t going to make me move. You will, in fact, cause me to go slower, especially if there is traffic. Especially if there is traffic!

Maybe that makes me a jerk. Don’t care.

If you can clearly see there are cars next to me and in front of me, I obviously have nowhere to go. So explain to me how exactly riding my ass is going to motivate me to get out of your way? It won’t. Let’s be clear. I will make me more obstinate that I already am.

Listen, people, if you are one of those drivers that just can’t peel yourself off the bumper in front of you – pray you never drive behind me. Your head will pop, and I will smile.

Have a nice day.