Unhappy returns

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The time has come and I am not liking it whatsoever. Mostly because I feel it is so unnecessary. I can literally do this anywhere in the world and having an office, a cubical, is the most unwanted and unnecessary thing in the world right now.

Tomorrow, I have to start going back to the office.

The telecommute policy has been expanded, but that still means I am going to have to go back to the office on an average of two, sometimes three, days a week, depending on the month and various other activities that need in-person attendance.

Of course, we all now know that nothing really requires an in-person presence since we have been away from the office for 15 months straight and we have been doing our job completely and totally without fail for that time.

As you can probably assume, or tell, I am not stoked about this in any way.

Red alert!

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Quick, batten down the hatches! Secure the doors! Turn off the lights and be silent!

No coffee in Cubicalville today and the two cups during the commute are not going to suffice. Plain and simple.

If you have the capability, send coffee QUICK!

**If you tuned in yesterday, you know why this is an emergency and you now know it was not remedied over night. The hero of this story will likely die.**

There will be no joy today. There will be no productive things accomplished. There will be no exceptional customer service today.

There will be grumpiness. There will be pining for coffee. There will be sleepiness. There will be desperation.

OK, I better get off of here and go try to see if I can suck the value out of someone’s used up coffee pod from the garbage. Maybe I can just stuff some of those used coffee grinds in between the gum and cheek…

There will be no spitting today.