morning | Piss and Moan

Commute bonus

Posted on September 22, 2021 by backuphill

An early morning, first day of Fall, sunrise. #nofilter

There are very few things good about getting up early. There are very few things good about having to commute to work. There are just very few good things that can even be mentioned when you combine those two things together.

However, this morning I was witness to one of the best sunrises I have seen in a long while. It was quite breathtaking. I wish I could have stopped right there on the highway and gotten a better picture.

So, I guess you can call it a commute bonus. I wasn’t looking for it. I wasn’t asking for it. I really didn’t even want it. But, I am glad I got to see it.

Pooped

Posted on November 13, 2020 by backuphill

Maybe this falls into the TMI category, maybe it doesn’t. I am sure the male readers in the group can probably attest to something of a similar experience, and if nothing else it might provide for a little comedic reading.

So, I am an early morning pooper.

I really prefer to get to my squatting done before my shower. I mean, that way I can head into the day with a freshly clean keister and don’t have to worry about unintentional stankiness (at least for the first part of the day).

So, typically the day begins after crawling outta bed with a squat on the porcelain throne. The amount of time can vary, but usually the business is done in 15-20 minutes and then I can proceed to the shower.

Today, I spent my usual time on the commode and then proceeded to hop into the shower. Not 10 minutes later, I am getting the painful feeling that I need to cop-a-squat again. Now I am feeling those gaseous pains and squeezing the cheeks together hoping that I am not gonna drop a package in the shower. Thankfully, it subsided briefly and I was able to finish my shower.

After getting outta the shower, no pressing feeling to visit the “thinking throne” is persisting so I am thinking I am gonna be able to start the day as usual. I get dressed and make coffee.

HELLO! I am reminded that the gas has not passed and either I am gonna have to do the penguin waddle to the water closet or find something to lean up against and endure the sharp pain in the middle region again. I wait because no waddle will happen without an accident. After the gurgling stops and the pain is tempered, I quickly head for the pooper.

Wait…the gas pains have returned, literally just before the pants come down and I am left staring at the crapper whilst I grimace through the next wave of internal chaos. WTH! Literally a foot from the squatter and I can’t use it….yet…

I am not sure why decided to turn my bowels into a problematic mess that required multiple visits to the porcelain bowl. Either way, that last trip seemed to do the trick. The main tank has been completely emptied.

I still would have liked to done it the first time and not had to put on pants feeling “unclean.”

There ya go! A little Friday the 13th potty humor/giggle/TMI for you.

Anyone else have similar experiences or habits?

197

Posted on April 13, 2020 by backuphill

Photo by Zachary DeBottis on Pexels.com

Today marks the return back to work, from vacation.

Coming off the “worst” vacation ever (see previous Day 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 posts), getting back to work is still tough.

Last night as I enjoyed some down time I began to think of the things that would need to get done on my first day back to work…several things that didn’t get done before I left and, knowing there would be a crap ton of emails while I was gone, newly assigned things for my return. As you might imagine, the dread for the coming work day started.

Not to disappoint, 197 emails filled my inbox. Fortunately, that is likely a number that is down from the usual vacation absence since schools are not operating as normal so support needs have dwindled slightly. So, I have been wading through those this morning. After an hour and 15 minutes, I still have 87 more emails to get through. Yes, there are some that just need deleted as they are quick communications between team members for innocuous things. I am glad for those. It makes that number go down faster!

Anyway, I better get back to those emails. Oh, and I have a meeting right off the bat too.

Where’s my coffee?

Morning minute

Posted on August 14, 2019 by backuphill

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

It’s gonna be a busy day. I looked at the schedule for the day ahead and all I can think about is how am I going to get it all done? There is just too much.

If you have been around long enough, you know that I get to telecommute two days a week from home. Normal days are Wednesday and Thursday (with an occasional Tuesday thrown in to make up for a meeting when it comes up during the week).

So, today I am in the garage, which is “my place” in the house, though it isn’t exclusively mine since it is mostly storage for a variety of things. Half the garage is tools and whatnot….and my home office.

It gets warm in here. Or cold in here. Depends on the time of the year because it isn’t that well insulated (well, in some places it isn’t at all). With the weather being warmer these days up in the PNW, the garage has had to have a fan going while I work from home. This morning, while things are quiet in the neighborhood I have opened the door and am letting in the cool air of the morning. It feels good.

I have found like that I like the coolness of the air. The slowness of the morning as I have time to “just be” and time to sip a cup of coffee (or four). It is just nice to take a moment to breathe and to take in the quiet stillness. To watch the sun rise over the tops of the trees. Calm before the storm of the day.

I am getting tired of the constant storm, but the morning minute helps to put my head on straight for the day and look forward.

*raises cup of coffee* Here’s to the cool, quiet mornings, and a chance to breathe. May you also have that moment of the day where you can pause and take it in for a minute.

Where is your place of solace? Where do you like to go when the stress of life gets to be too much? What do you do (or not do)?

About last night

Posted on July 5, 2019 by backuphill

Photo by Kaboompics .com on Pexels.com

It’s a full pot of coffee kinda drinking day.

I am going to venture a guess that not all who needed yesterday’s PSA, actually read it. I say as much since it was well after midnight when the explosions stopped and the dog stopped cowering.

Sleep. It was hard to come by and this poor guy had to get up early, like usual, for work. I am now sitting at my desk and wishing I could just have an IV of coffee. Last night is going to make for a long day at work…

Have a coffee. Have another. And another. Oh, the next one’s on me (if you find me and use the code, “I’ll have a 4th”). I am fixing to have another…and another…and another…

Perk up! It’s another day.

Morning that got away

Posted on April 12, 2019 by backuphill

grayscale photo of a man in houndstooth print suit jacket wearing a hat

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Traffic accident on the commute.

Nearly late for usual Friday morning meeting.

Email.

More meetings.

Doing my job.

Yeah, the morning got away from me and there is no getting it back, as it is 12:25pm (my time). As such, the post today is 4.5 hours later than normal. So sorry.

AS you can imagine, that’s really annoying and I need to plan farther ahead. It’s just hard to keep up some days. A plate will fall once in a while.

Or a few plates.

How is your day? Have you had one get away from you lately?

Like a wrecking ball

Posted on March 4, 2019 by backuphill

trump-1

Anyone else feel like they hit a wall the moment they left the bed?

The urge to return to the warm confines of the sheets and just melt back into the mattress was very strong this morning.

MONDAY came in like a wrecking ball. It never hit so hard…

*There ya go, get that little ditty outta your head now*

You’re welcome, and unhappy Monday to you too.

Now, where is my intravenous coffee pot?

The evil that lurks inside

Posted on January 28, 2019 by backuphill

Photo by Rene Asmussen on Pexels.com

There is evil in the house.

It resides in a place you never thought to look, yet it rears it’s ugly head at the most inopportune time and it strikes fear in all who encounter it. It most often shows itself in red, digital form but has been known by other identifications as well. It squawks. Sometimes it plays music at unimaginable volumes of incoherence.

The evil of which I speak?

The Saturday morning alarm clock.

Why is it that the man-child in the house can’t figure out his damn alarm clock but can figure out how to subvert Netflix security?

The alarm clock has a week day setting so it only goes off on school days, but NO he has it set for every day of the week. So, Saturday morning rolls around and the 6:00am squawking of a high pitched chirp can be heard throughout the house. There is no escaping it and there is no ignoring it, unless you are he who sleeps right next to it.

I swear if I have to stumble out of bed, half asleep, through a dark house to unplug (yes, I didn’t even bother with switches and nobs) the thing, again, I am going to blow a gasket. I mean like really.

Wait, maybe I’ll self impose the dog house. There are no alarms in there…

Shut up and leave me alone

Posted on September 7, 2018 by backuphill

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep…

Snooze.

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep…

Snooze.

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep…

OK, fine. Shut up already. I’m up…

Every stupid day of my life (or at least it seems that way).

Alarm clocks are the worst invention ever. OK, maybe not the worst because getting to work on time is a must, so let’s just say they’re the second worst.

Do I really need this job? I could get rid of the alarm clock…

Extreme dislike – Morning Routine

Posted on August 22, 2018 by backuphill

Photo by Josh Sorenson on Pexels.com

You know how you have that one thing that you really just don’t like doing? Do you wish there was a permanent solution so you didn’t have to do it? Yeah, me too.

In this case I am talking about – SHAVING!

Ugh, I hate doing it. I hate that it takes so much time to do it in the mornings. I hate that I have to buy razors and handles and cream/foam/gel (whatever). I hate that I have to look at my ugly mug each morning and debate, “Is today the day? Should I shave or not? Can I get away with not doing it today?”

OK, ladies, I know. I know! Stop complaining, right? I realize I have way less surface area to shave. But, I also can’t (realistically) hide my noggin in pants, or under a skirt (or even in a mask). You at least have that! I don’t have the option to hide it if I don’t want to shave.

And, yes, I could just go full lumberjack (or worse, hipster…), but this just isn’t really acceptable in the business world quite yet and I also have some health issues that keep from doing it long term. So, yeah, there are limitations that make it necessary to shave.

I just hate it.