Uninvited

close up photography of bird nest

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OK, am I crazy here? Am I being unreasonable?

If you have guests staying in your home, do you think it is inappropriate for them to invite guests over to your house? Essentially, guests are inviting guests into your home.

Furthermore, what if all the guests are family?

So, some family is now living in my home for an undetermined amount of time. It’s been less than a week since this change. One of the conditions of moving in was that they were not allowed to have guests over, because having people in your space is one thing but then to have those people inviting strangers into your home because they are their friends, is just a whole other problem. This condition seemed to be understood.

Anyway, last night I overheard a conversation where the newly homed family members (in my home) were making plans with other family members who don’t exactly live nearby, but are within driving distance of their own home, to stay at the house. I believe the conversation went something like, “Well, you can come and hang out for the evening and we can probably find a place for you to crash. Driving home that late doesn’t make sense. I am sure we can find room. It’ll be fun. You can just go home the next day.

Excuse me? Fun for whom? Have you checked with me yet? Is this OK with me? You are making plans for me and my home without checking with me first. How is that OK? I mean, I have already altered my life to allow some family to stay in the house, do I really need to rearrange my life just so more family can stay in my house? Really?

Does it make a difference in this situation if the family members involved are your adult children and grandkids? One adult child has moved in with her 11 year old daughter. They are inviting our middle son and his family (wife, 3 boys under 7) to stay at the house too. Mind you, there is barely enough room for the people already staying in the house…

Am I crazy here? Am I being selfish?

I liked my nest empty. I want it back that way. That’s not to say I don’t love the kids and grandkids, but come on…it’s kind of the principle of the thing, isn’t it?

The phone call we all dread

man person face portrait

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Yep, it happened. I got the call we all dread over the last weekend. The one that you just wish you didn’t answer the phone. The one that makes you regret getting up in the morning.

“Hi, it’s your sis. Are you available next weekend? We are gonna move and need some help.”

And there it is…yes, you are free and no you don’t want to help. You don’t want to help because moving sucks, always. It is no fun moving yourself, let alone someone else. So, no, I am not free and no I don’t want to help.

“Yeah, I am free. What time do you need me to be there?”

Damn it! That isn’t what I was going to say. Stupid family relations. So you go help.

While you’re there and after having moved stuff all day, your mom says, “While I have you all together, can you do me a favor? After we’re done here, can you all come over to the house and move the piano out of the house? Someone is coming to pick it up.”

Are you serious, mom? We just spend all day moving someone else’s crap and now we gotta go move a piano? I swore off moving pianos the last time I moved a piano. I am NOT doing it this time.

I hate being a good family member. 2500 pounds of piano later…I need pain killer.