Culture

I don’t want you…

Posted on by backuphill

white and black soccer ball on side of green grass field during daytime

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Kids. They can be so confusing.

When my daughter was really young she used to tell me that she “didn’t want me.” I, of course, knew she was mad at me and knew that she wasn’t really speaking truth, at least the truth of a 2-3 year old.

Now I find myself in the later years, as she is a teen, saying more things that start with, “I don’t want you…”

Most of the time is related to a request for her independence and I respect that. I shouldn’t need or want to do everything for her. I am willing to let her explore things on her own and allow her the freedom to have success and to make mistakes. I may not always be happy about the choices, but they are hers to make. I can, of course, choose not to honor the “I don’t want you…” if I know the choice or decision isn’t in her best interest and is dangerous.

She now has a job. It’s doing something she likes (kinda, kids don’t really like to work) and in a sport she has enjoyed for a long time. She has been reffing soccer games for the parks and rec. For the most part, she has enjoyed it and she has been successful at it this year.

I once said, shortly after she got the job, that I was going to come watch her some time. Her response was, “Dad, I don’t want you to come watch me ref games.” When asked why she said that was just weird, that parents aren’t supposed to go to their kids’ place of work just so they can watch them. OK, get that. We visited my son at Taco Bell shortly after he got his first job just to tease him a little but it wasn’t to sit and watch him during his whole shift.

So, to honor her request, I have stayed away. Part of me wants to go watch her and be proud of the job she does, but I can also do that just sitting at home. I don’t have to see her to know she is doing the best she can, really enjoying what she is doing at the time, and be proud of her too. Right?

Am I correct in honoring her “Dad, I don’t want you…”?

Why can’t kids come with a damn instruction manual?

white and black soccer ball on side of green grass field during daytime

Ask not

Posted on by backuphill

army burial cemetery cross

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What can you do for me? What am I going to get out of it?

That seems to be the prevailing question these days. No one does anything for free, or because it’s the right thing to do. There always seems to be a catch, or something has to be gained from it. Is it a millennial thing? Is it just a generational thing?

The entitlement generation. A generation that feels something is owed to them – for doing not much of anything.

Contrast that to the Greatest Generation. One who didn’t ask what could be gained. One that didn’t ask what was in it for them. One that didn’t ask if there was danger. They just did it when they were called.

Today, on the 75th anniversary of D-Day, we could use more people who answered the call without hesitation (not just drafted but volunteered) and did their duty without asking for anything. Even today, they don’t recognize that they are heroes. I have been told many times by vets of WWII, “We just did our jobs.” 

JFK said in a speech a few years later, “Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country.” We have far too many people asking for the country to do something for them. Too many.

It’s time to stop asking for. No one is owed anything. You earn it.

Hard work. Perseverance. Sweat. Time. Patience. Hard work.

Ask not.

Give.

Non-competitive

Posted on by backuphill

white baseball ball on brown leather baseball mitt

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So, up here in the Seattle region, there have been a lot of years where our professional sports teams haven’t been competitive.

We once had the Sonics who won the world championship way back in the last 70’s. They don’t even exist any longer. We have had the Seahawks really step things up over the last 7 or 8 years with a playoff team and two trips in a row to the Superbowl, even winning the first. There is the Storm and they have won several championships, but there aren’t really that many people who pay attention to them. We also have the Sounders and they have won some a title or two as well, and for the “most popular sport in the world” they do draw huge crowds of rabid fans here. Finally, there are the Mariners…40+ years of mostly irrelevant baseball.

The Mariners have been a modern demonstration of Sisyphus. Yes, there have been a couple seasons where it seemed they might actually break through, only to have them end with a mighty crash and burn. As fans, we actually go into every season with hope for the boys of summer but actually know it is just a practice in futility. This season is no better.

It’s “rebuild” season again…and they’re bad. Competitive in two seasons? Yeah, not likely.

Good thing I just love baseball or I would have stopped paying attention a long time ago.

Cart…horse…

Posted on by backuphill

man riding on the carriage surrounded by trees

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Irritating, isn’t it?

When people put the cart before the horse?

Lots of people do it.

Jump to conclusions. Assume the worst. Overthink it. Worry before you know.

I have been known to do it myself.

Isn’t it weird how people, in general, do it more and more?

 

Friendship tests

Posted on by backuphill

green friends text

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Anyone else tired of those things going around on social media, or real life, that try to prompt people into a response?

You know, the one that says read this all, copy  & paste this, and then I’ll return the favor? Or, the one that says I am cleaning out my “friends” list so unless you comment something I’ll likely delete you? This one is great…I am trying to see which of my friends is paying attention…or, copy and past this obvious phishing scam answer skimmer test so we can play a game together and learn more about each other.

Desperate attempts at attention much?

OK, so social media has allowed us all to be voyeurs in each other’s lives (or at least the “best parts” of it) when we allow others to see it.

But what about those friends/acquaintances that probe your friendship by popping in and out of the picture to see if you’re still there? Like that friend from high school or college that randomly messages/texts you to see what you’re up to but you think might secretly have an agenda? Or that friend you only hear from once every 6-8 months, checking in saying, “Hey, we should get together and hang out” but then never follow through. Better yet, how about the one that will get back in touch and act like your best friend for a short time, reconnecting like no time has passed and it was only yesterday that you stopped seeing each other, only to disappear a few weeks later?

I can see you nodding your head…I see you have people like that in your life too…

Hey, wanna be friends? LOL

Pardon me

Posted on by backuphill

book business calendar close up

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Pardon me, but your agenda is showing.

Some companies are good at hiding it. Others not so much. Some blatantly censor content (Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube), some do not. Some quietly push a liberal agenda and some quietly push a conservative agenda (though this is becoming more rare).

If you take a look at the Discover feed, here on WordPress (parent company Automattic), you will see that over time their agenda is beginning to show. It isn’t about highlighting good content, though it may be to some, it’s about highlighting only one side of the content – that which fits their agenda.

Thus, I have found myself skipping Discover because there isn’t necessarily good writing or salient points of view, just agenda. A confirmation bias of politically correct, social “justice” agenda. I wanna see ALL points of view. I wanna see ALL manners of opinion. I wanna see an agenda-less feed of good writing, art, history, politics, food, humor, entertainment, DIY, outdoors, and hobbies.

Is that too much to ask?

Ain’t a whole new world

Posted on by backuphill

taj mahal

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Unfortunately, Disney has found it necessary to continue to grab money by remaking it’s classic animated movies into “live action” movies. It’s rather irritating, really.

I wasn’t a fan of the Beauty and the Beast remake. I saw it on DVD. I am not liking what I am seeing so far for the Aladdin remake. I am optimistically hopeful for the Lion King remake.

Disney continues to make these remakes because they can and people pay money to see them, well, because it’s Disney. Really though, it is just a money grab. I suspect that if Disney made an animated movie, releasing it in February, and then took the exact same movie and made it live action for release in November – well, people would pay to see both. Because, as consumers, we just aren’t that bright.

It ain’t a whole new world. It’s just a rehashed and recycled world.

Just gimme an answer

Posted on by backuphill

gymnast near assorted country flags

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I had a friend in college that would never give a straight answer. He talked in circles. It was amusing at times, and we could spar for an hour or two before it got tiresome. Most of the time I got an answer but it was mental gymnastics to get there.

I have other people in my life who typically “beat around the bush” to give me an answer. They think they are being clear in giving an answer but it just isn’t. It could be interpreted in several different ways and trying to decipher the answer usually leads to more issues I can’t get answers to.

It’s a conundrum I tell you. The more I try to clarify the more frustrated they become because I am told that I am not listening. Really? Because there was no “Yes” or “No” in that answer so how am I not listening? Maybe it’s just that someone can’t speak clearly.

I know I can be a bit black and white at times, but not getting a simple answer to a simple question is frustrating as hell. Just gimme an answer!

Do you have someone in your life that frustrates you by not giving you clear answers?

Magical calories

Posted on by backuphill

img_5515

You know, math is hard. I really think very few people like it. I suspect many of my readers are probably in the same boat as I am when it comes to math. You’d just rather not do it. Sometimes, I just don’t get it. This, however, seems to be simple math and since I am no math prodigy I think I can handle it.

The label on this bottle of carbonated and flavored water is a mathematical mind-bender. Or, perhaps someone just doesn’t have any labeling sense. Or, maybe, they’re just magical calories!

There are three servings in the 36 oz. bottle (12 oz. per serving). According to the way I read this, if you drink one serving at a time, there are ZERO calories. However, if you drink the bottle all at once (or over time?) you will get a whopping 15 calories . Duly noted. Don’t consume the entire bottle. Ever. You will avoid all calories if you leave one ounce in the bottle.

But wait!! There is something funny going on here. It just doesn’t add up. If there are three servings for a total of 15 calories, how does the math break down to ZERO calories per serving? Wouldn’t that be 5 calories per serving?

Anyone else confused by this math?

Do I really want an answer? NO! How about we just apply those magical calories to pizza? I am thinking, ZERO calories per slice and only 80 calories if you eat the whole thing. That would be satisfying.

Have you ever run into a dieting math problem that didn’t make sense?

Asking for a friend

Posted on by backuphill

black and white business career close up

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So let’s get this straight…generally speaking…

The people who are against the death penalty for murderers, rapists, and child molesters are the same people who support abortion and infanticide?

The same people who are outraged by animal shelters killing unwanted animals are NOT similarly outraged by killing babies.

The same people who are worried about animals going extinct place more value on the animals than on human life?

Is any of this incongruent?

Again, asking for a friend…