Shut up already!

Every office has at least one. Every school faculty has one too. I am sure every factory has one, I just haven’t worked in one. To be fair, it is probably true of just about every place of employment around the world.

What is that, you ask? The only co-worker that asks a question at the end of a staff meeting that makes the meeting go unnecessarily long. Am I right?

Can I ask one more question? Can I get some clarification on…? Would it be ok…? Why…?

The questions come in all shapes and sizes but what we all know is that the question could have been addressed in a private conversation or in a covered in an email. But instead, we are left sitting in a meeting we didn’t want to be in in the first place listening to people we don’t like or marginally tolerate ask questions we already know the answer to or don’t care to know.

Just shut up already and let us get back to work! Please stop the torture.

#smh

The “shipping and handling” lie

$7 for less than $2 of paper.

We all know it is a lie and yet we just keep putting up with it because we want our stuff, no matter what it is.

“Shipping and handling” fees are usually tagged on at the very end of ordering something online. They get you all the way through the process only to find out there is that fee…and in most cases the fee is totally outrageous but we’re stuck and they know it.

A prime example is school pictures for your kids. I typically just order the digital image download because they I can have pictures printed as I need them or just for the people who want them. It should be a quick and simple transaction. Instead, there is a company out here (maybe in other places too) that my kid’s school uses that rapes you with the fee.

I am getting a digital download, meaning you have my email address because I am supplying you with a credit card. There is NO REASON to send me a hard copy of anything! Yet, this company insists that you need a hard copy of the “copyright release”. So, they send you, in the mail (that takes a week) for a $1.21, a printed copy of the release and a code so you can download the image. Really? A hard copy?!? You could have sent that in an email, like the second I pressed the button to pay for the photo of my kid.

Nope! Dorian Studios has to send it to you for the tune of $7.00. The photo shows you that clearly it didn’t cost $7 to send the hard copy. Clearly they are making money on the “shipping & handling” when it doesn’t even need to happen in the first place. What a scam and a lie!

#smh

Can we just take a nap now?

Going back to work after a long (4 days, in my case) weekend is just punishment no one should have to endure. How about if you all continue to work and I’ll just take a permanent retirement where I still collect my paycheck? 

Yeah, I think that sounds good. 

It’s only 15 minutes into the work day and I can tell it is going to be a long day already…

#smh

Something I already know

man wearing white shirt and gray dress pants sitting on green stool

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Ever gone to one of those “trainings” where they train you on something you already know?

Yeah, me too.

So you spend three hours doing the “bobs”…that’s the fun activity where your head nods up and down while you fight dozing off and keeping your head upright. Some people call them the “nods” but I just call them the bobs because it reminds me of a fishing bobber that tries to stay above the surface of the water as the fish pulls it down…think of this as your head trying to stay out of the fog of sleep.

Anyway, here’s to hoping your Friday isn’t ruined by someone telling you something you already know.

 

Wardrobe tragedy

photo of man tossing nescafe mug

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There is nothing worse than getting dressed up only to have a wardrobe tragedy occur without warning, and there rarely ever occur with warning so they are always a tragedy.

Raise your hand if you have ever: dropped food on your shirt/blouse? Dropped food on your pants/dress/skirt/shorts? Dropped food on your tie? Missed both your top AND bottom only to have it land on your shoe? Had it happen to your favorite outfit?

Dang it already…guess I’ll just throw this attire away and start over tomorrow.

 

**This post is NOT sponsored by Nescafe, but if it wants to I would completely open to large amounts of money.

Dust much?

abstract angelic art blast

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Who the hell is supposed to dust around here?

Anyone else have this problem? You know, the one where you wake up one day and there seems to be a layer of dust on everything?

At work, there is a cleaning crew and I would assume they are supposed to dust, but apparently not. I can understand not dusting the inner portions of shelving and whatnot, I don’t expect that every nook and cranny be dusted. But do you think you could maybe run a cloth across the top of the book shelf once in a while? I mean, serious, it doesn’t have anything on top of it!

Seriously folks, there is enough dust on top of the shelf to qualify as an indoor, organic planter.

I’ll take care of my home, but I don’t expect to have to do it at work too.

Software updates

adult camera casual clean

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“We’re sorry, the software update over the weekend broke the software. Your job will be impossible until it is fixed. Please be patient as the squirrels work magic to make it work again.”

OR

“Daylight Savings, in conjunction with a software update over the weekend, has broken your software. Please freak out and give us a call.”

Damn, we have a bad case of the Mondays today….

Dremel Multi-Max anything but max

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Don’t you hate it when things just stop working? Yeah, me too.

I received this thing as a gift for my birthday one year. It didn’t get used for about three months and then it got used whole working on a remodel of a birthday. It was a helpful too, except when it wasn’t working.

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Right from the start there was something wrong with the variable speed switch. Shake it, smack it with the ball of your hand, hold it just right and it would work. Finally I resorted to jamming a small shim into the switch area and it worked great at full speed. The problem was the shim couldn’t stay there forever since the tool obviously wasn’t designed to work that way. Total time in use, maybe an hour when all said and done?

The project ended and it got stored away. As you can see, it didn’t get abused or anything of the sort.

I dug it out to use it the other day. Doesn’t work at all now. Dead. Removed the shim, nothing. Put the shim back in, nothing. Now what? Obviously it is out of the warranty period. Totally disappointing it doesn’t work.

So, who’s the tool now? Dremel or me?

Selling rude behavior

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Anyone out there use social media sites to sell the crap they no longer need or want?

It seems there are all kinds of sites out there these days offering the ability to sell stuff. Ebay and Craigslist were really the first ones but since then others have popped up, each attempting to make the process more streamlined and convenient.

You, of course, now have the option (I can’t possibly name them all) of OfferUp, Facebook Marketplace, Etsy, any my wife just found something called TopHatter. All have their own rules and in many ways are pretty similar. I have used both OfferUp and Facebook with mixed results.

Horror story time (OK, not really horror, but rude nonetheless)! It has not happened to me twice…you see an item you want to buy, you inquire about it, you find out it is still available, and then you agree on a time and place to meet (always in public). It used to be that a “gentleman’s agreement” was enough but apparently we live in a society with no honor.

The first occasion was actually a business going out of business and the furniture was for sale. I had to drive 30 minutes to get there but traffic was not great because of a collision. I messaged the seller to let her know I would be a couple minutes late but got no response. When I arrived at the location I was exactly four minutes late. When I walked in the door I found the two pieces I was purchasing and when I went to pay for it the lady said everything in the store had already been purchased by one buyer. I was a little dumbfounded. We had already agreed!! All she said was, “Sorry. You were late so I didn’t know if you were coming.”

The second occasion was just last week. A guy was selling a lawnmower that was near new. He lived in another town 37 miles away, but I worked near there so I asked if I could pick it up the next day since I would be going through on my way home from work. He agreed and we set up a place to meet. An hour after we agreed, he messages me and says, “Sorry, buddy, someone just came and picked it for full price.” Uh, what?? I was going to pay full price and I agreed to purchase it first!

Ok, so those are two of my stories. People not honoring their word. It shouldn’t surprise me because people suck, really. Anyway, OfferUp has a way to rate buyers and sellers but it is ONLY if the transaction actually takes place. So, for the most part, people have positive reviews since they only get reviewed on what they actually sell. There is no way to review sellers (or buyers) when the transaction hasn’t taken place, which is a big fault of the program, I believe. I am sure people have things sold right from under them all the time, but there is no way to report it. That’s a big downside to the program, even if most experiences are positive.

What’s your experience? Share your nightmare stories below.

Is this what Hell looks like?

apartment chair clean contemporary

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I think I was being punished yesterday.

Why, you ask?

I attempted what no rational adult should attempt.

I went shopping at IKEA with kids. OK, there, I said it. I have known it for a while but I am irrational.

It is a HUGE mistake to take your kids shopping with you at IKEA. They whine. They complain. They constantly have to be taken to the bathroom. They touch things. They run around. All while you are slowly losing your mind and repeating yourself incessantly. Yes, they do have a “play area” for kids. BUT, get this…apparently there are so many rules that few kids even qualify. And if they do, they can only stay there for an hour. Yeah, you read that right, AN HOUR!! It take like three hours just to walk through the store, let alone try and shop.

No rational conversations can be had. No decisions can be made.

All you wanna do when you’re done at the place is smash your head against something hard until you pass out. Yes, that must be what Hell will be like…eternally shopping with your kids.

Here’s an IDEA…IKEA should be a kid free zone.