History | Piss and Moan

Backing out

A few years ago I startedd playing disc golf as a way to get outta the house and do some walking. It was right before the global flu took hold so I played right through it. It’s now been a couple years and the buddy that I get out on the course with has now invited a couple other guys to join us and learn the game too. I like them all and generally have no complaints about them.

That aside, one of the guys that is now included in the group is getting the reputation for backing out and it’s rather annoying.

He is invited to hang out on the course with us or he even initiates and invites us to hang out with him to play. Plans are typically set to meet at a time and course and people are looking forward to it.

Then he backs out.

He usually uses the excuse that he worked all day and is too tired. OK, I get it and an ocassional instance would be one thing. We all work and obviously that can be a deciding factor but out of 10 invites he uses this as an excuse six times. If you are tired or think it will be a deciding factor for you, don’t say your are going to go. Just don’t commit.

Sometimes he uses his small child and even his wife as an excuse to back out. Again, this is understandable, but again it can also be something that can be decided before committing to meet.

Anyway, what would you do? Keep inviting or accepting invites knowing he most likely will not follow through, or do you drop him and not invite him any longer?

Left hanging

Posted on March 23 by backuphill

The current work world is filled with many frustrations. So numerous, in fact, that they can’t all be enumerated. Just the fact that I have to report to work each day is frustrating. But that is a discussion for another day…

Anyway, remote work obviously has it’s advantages and I really like it. However, the one aspect of remote work that I highly dislike is that co-workers are not all responsible about answering their IMs. Thus, when you are trying to get some help on a support ticket and a colleague leaves you hanging by leaving your message unread for extended periods of time is infuriating.

We are required to have TEAMS open at all time and visible (as in not hidden behind other windows) so that we can respond to teammates in a timely manner. We get alerts when someone has messaged us. The icon at the bottom of the screen in the task bar is a different color and blinks. So I am not sure what this particular co-worker’s problem is. It’s not like you can’t tell someone has messaged you, even if the window ends up buried behind other windows.

I know others have complained (as well as me) that messages get left sitting for long periods of time.

So, today I sent a message at 9:28am and I have sent a follow-up message to make the alerts trigger again at 10:19am. It’s been nearly an hour of no response. I finally received a response at 10:45am.

Hard to get work done, to help clients, with that kind of wait time from a co-worker, especially when you know they can see the message there waiting for them.

Do you hate it when you have to wait for a response from a co-worker? Does it infuriate you when you know they saw it and still don’t respond, even just to say “Let me check it out” or some kind of acknowledgement that they saw your message?

Unnecessary apology #4

Posted on March 16 by backuphill

It was the 80s. What can I say? We all did things back then that we probably look back and cringe with disdain. 1986 was the transistion year between middle school and high school. It was awkward. Despite being fitting for the time, I look back at my former self and realize now that if I judge myself through the current “progressive” lens (even though I am not) that I really should be ashamed of myself. So, today’s unnecessary apology goes out to…

Egyptians.

Yes, Egyptians.

Why? Well, if you knew then what you know now, then today that the little dance you did in your bedroom or lockeroom or living room or bar would be prohibited. Why? Because of some kind of appropriation. I am not sure if it would be cultural or national or something else, but it is just so regretable now.

I am guilty. I am guilty of walking like an Egyptian.

Therefore, though I am not sure I really need to, I want to apologize to all the Egyptians (past, present, and into perpetuity) for doing this silly act.

I was young. I was impressionable.

I blame it on the Bangles. Their “Walk like an Egyptian” song is totally at fault. It was just such a catchy little tune. And, hey, if my silly and awkward movements might have caught Susanna Hoff’s attention somehow, well, that would have been just awesome.

So, yeah, sorry about that, Egyptians.

Just try not to get your groove (and appropriation) on when listening…

CD situation

Posted on March 10 by backuphill

CD. Compact Disc.

Do you remember those things called CDs? Remember when that was the next best technology and you were buying hundreds of those things? Remember when storage of those things became an issue?

Recently I was reminded of all those things…because I was cleaning out the entertainment cabinet and I had to remove FIVE folders that are capable of holding 100 discs at a time. All but one is full and the last one is 3/4s full.

Those folders hold all the discs I ever bought, plus the CD case art (from and back). Once upon a time it was difficult to store all those cases and moving them to the folders seemed like a great idea. Plus, those CD jewel cases were brittle as heck too, as soon as you dropped one it was inevitably broken and didn’t work correctly.

Well, now what the heck am I supposed too do with all those CDs?

Disc drives on computers are getting harder and hard to come by. Shoot, even cars don’t even really come with CD players any more. Converting them to digital takes time and storage (though I had already gone through every disc I had at one point and pulled all the songs off the discs I really wanted). So, now I am stuck…do I just trash them or do I donate them? Do I try to sell them?

UGH

There is a ton of money locked up in those and throwing them away seems like a waste since I purchased all the music, even if I don’t listen to it (well, all of it). Do you know what I mean? If I were to get rid of them, it feels like something would be lost but at the same time nothing would be.

What would you do?

Random application

Posted on March 8 by backuphill

Not really looking, but I am at the same time. Something happened the other day that kind of surprised me, about myself, and I have thought about it ever since.

As a little background, just over two years ago I was thinking I might lose my job. The organization I work for was being mandated by the state to require it’s employees get a poke in the arm for “immunization,” of…well, you know…. I was thinking I might lose my job because I was going to have to go through the process of basically applying for an exemption and there was some question about whether it would be granted since the process was set up to work against employees who claimed it. In the process of getting ready to lose my job, I started accounts at several online job search sites – LinkedIn and Indeed. After getting all that set up and getting alerts for job notifications set up I was granted my exemption and I have continues to work at my current place of employment.

But, in the meantime, I am still getting alerts about potential job opportunities because loyalty to employees really no longer exists in most cases so if the right opportunity came along, why not jump ship for something better? It’s a tad scary, the thought of starting over so I haven’t really payed much attention to the alerts I was getting. Well, until the other day…

I got a job notification that kinda stuck out. Basically, it would be doing the same thing I am doing but for a REALLY large company. I would be product support for customers, providing troubleshooting and documentation and creating self-help information at Netflix.

Now, I probably wouldn’t have even considered applying except that LinkedIn made it so easy. “Click this button to apply” was basically the instructions. So I did. After literally 10 clicks to verify my info, provide just a tiny bit more, and upload my resume I had applied for the job. It was so easy!

I have no illusion that I’ll get hired, or even an interview. But what surprised me was the easy for submitting an application.

Additionally, I was surprised that I even submitted one in the first place.

I am not really looking, as I said previously, but the thought of a job that would allow me to work fully remotely, for at least as much pay as I am currently receiving, was definitely attractive. And it only takes a few (or more) clickes? What is there to lose at that point?

Anyone else surprise themselves applying for a job they weren’t really looking for?

Ballot harvesting

Posted on February 14 by backuphill

There appears to be a new tactic in the voting arena and the underlying motive would seem to be ballot harvesting.

I gotta say this is a bit disturbing as this would essentially require someone to register to vote. Now, I am all for voting and have never missed a vote that I can remember. However, voting is a right guaranteed to every American citizen not a requirement of every American citizen. Making it a requirement, in my estimation, practically compels someone to “speak”, which would be a Constitutional violation as there are protections against such a thing.

If you haven’t yet read the article but had to guess which party is sponsoring such a preposterous proposal, which do you suppose it would be? If you guessed Democrats, you’d be correct.

If you have have been paying attention, you might recall that Democrats/liberals have suddenly gotten real good at and have promoted endlessly the ability to “harvest ballots.” Now, in my state, they aim to make it easier to ballot harvest by requiring all eligible people to register to vote, have a ballot mailed to all those people, and then collect them from anyone who has completed their civic duty (or possible even the ones who haven’t). At the very least, it would provide a list of people who haven’t yet submitted a completed ballot and allow for them to pursue said ballot by visiting the home of the recipient.

“Hi, I’m Joe Blow from the Democratic party. Records show you haven’t yet submitted the voting ballot sent to you a week ago. I was here to see if you have completed it and if I could offer to deliver it for you….oh, you haven’t yet filled it it? OK, well, I am willing to wait if you’d like to do it now and then I could take it when you’re done…oh, you don’t know much about what is on the ballot? I could certainly offer some advice, if you’d like…”

Pressure.

I am sure you can probably imagine the numerous scenarios for which something like the above would take place. The problem with the who process is that it opens the potential for election security problems and that, despite what some will argue is not happening, is of serious concern and should be prevented.

Conspiracy theorist? Maybe.

Cautionary tale? Perhaps.

Completely pessimistic and skepitcal of motivations? Winner, winner chicken dinner!

Requiring someone to register is just bad. It isn’t how the democratic process works and shouldn’t even be considered.

What do you think? Am I off base on this?

Burned bridges

Posted on January 25 by backuphill

Well, the time has finally come and home is no longer a dreaded place. The subject of many of the rants on this blog has now burned a bridge and there is no chance of home turning into a place of total turmoil again (well, there is a large caviat to that I guess. More on that later.) It’s tough to go all the way back in time and cover all the ground that could be covered to properly put this whole thing into perspective, but that would be a lot of work and I am not sure you all care that much to have a complete picture. If you have been around the blog for a while, you can probably put things together with just the few posts mentioned here today.

I have tried to help those who couldn’t help themselves. I have been trying for many years and it finally came to a head this last weekend. The trouble with this is again that it is self-inflicted and someone thinks, yet again, they are the vicitim. Really, it is by choice and being unwilling to take any advice. Unfortunately, it’s the five grandchildren that will suffer the most.

When my step-son and his five kids were allowed to move in back in November there was hope that maybe there would be some changes in their lives that would lead to a postive outcome (and it might still but seeing that at this point is hard to imagine). Things that have been discussed here previously (see above as well as the following) was about wasted food, not parenting the grandchildren, and the outright disregard for sanity in parenting.

It finally all came to a head last Saturday.

The night before (Friday) by son had been up a large ortion of the night with the youngest grandchild because she was sick. As requested, he let us know he needed more sleep (he requested an hour) and we agreed to take over childcare duties so he could get some sleep. That request was abused and turned into four hours.

As a result, the five grandchildren were left in our care and we did everything we could to keep them occupied, busy, loved, dressed, fed, and entertained. We kept them from going in to wake their dad, even though he totally went beyond the time requested and agreed upon. At one point in the morning, the second oldest (age 6) got a little too rambunctious with the middle child (age 4) and repeated hit him “accidentally.” The 6-year old had been warned repeatedly and was asked at one point to stay on his bunk bed as a time out until he was released. Again, there was unusual noise and I checked on the commotion…the 6-year old was on the floor wrestling the 4-year old, having him pinned below him and him crying. I took one step into the room, delived a single swat to the backside of the 6-year old with my hand, which sent him crying back to his bunk.

He and I chatted about the incident not five minutes later and he admitted that he disobeyed, that he was playing too rough with his sibling, and that he hadn’t “accidentally” hit his sibling either. He went to far as to admit that he deserved the swat. He was back to playing and didn’t cause any other issues the rest of the day.

UNTIL. Until, he skipped into the room while his dad was making dinner and blurted out, “Grandpa hit me.”

I was there. He’s six, so his recollection of the events and why he got the swat weren’t entirely accurate. My son then proceeded to say, “Stop hitting my kids.”

Long story short, the discussion after that point corrected the events as told by the 6-year old, involved a threat of calling the police if I continued to discipline the children in a way that he didn’t agree with, and an ultimatum that said they’d move out if I (well, we, because my wife has spanked them too) didn’t bend to his parenting style, which includes the lack of discipline.

Mind you, he has virtually no place to go except one friend’s house which is not ideal for any of them.

So, I recommended finding a new place to stay since I was not going to do what he wanted me to do.

My wife and I had already had the discussion that this would likely come up again. There was a blow up about it a week prior where he basically packed up the kids with no coats, no socks, no shoes, and no food, and left the house for about 12 hours. We were clear when he left the first time that nothing on our part would change since we love the grandchildren and we are constanly having to step in to pick up the slack. We had the agonizing discussion that the threat of law enforcement would eventually be used and how we would respond to it…the conclusion was that we would ask that they move out, knowing full well that that wouldn’t be the best thing for the grandkids considering the turmoil they have endured over the last several years. But, we also knew he would refuse to leave them behind with us.

At this point, they haven’t returned. As far as we are concerned, he has burned his bridges with us. We, his mom and I, have been there and picked up the pieces enough. We love our grandkids, but for him we are done. If it really comes down to it, we will take the grandkids back to live in our house but he will not be welcome.

A tough decision, but we see no other way around it. We aren’t going have someone (even our son) threaten us and force us into living and “grandparenting” into a style we believe is wrong.

Home is more peaceful these days. It sucks considering what our grandkids are going through.

But, we couldn’t be held hostage in our own home either.

Debt limit

Posted on January 13 by backuphill

Time to tighten the belt.

Time to hunker down and make some painful adjustments.

Time for the government to live within it’s means and stop the unlimited spending.

You may have caught the article today saying the US will reach it’s debt limit and default by the end of next week, unless there is (again) a move to increase the limit. Every time this comes up, the debt limit is negotiated up…now sitting at $31 trillion.

Sorry, but you can’t have unlimited spending. You just can’t. Personal budgets don’t work that way. Company/business budgets don’t work that way. You can’t spend more and not cut it from somewhere else. That’s just not how it works. But, the government seems to think that’s they way to do it (especially one party, but both are guilty).

Time to stop assisting in places of the world that should take care of itself. Sure, I understand the goodwill generated by the international assistance fund, but we can’t afford it.

Time to stop paying for illegal immigrants to stay in the country.

Time to stop paying for every social “justice” fad that comes along.

Time to stop filling the budget with “pork“.

This doesn’t mean that increasing taxes is the answer either. Spend less, collect less. Collect only what is necessary.

Unfortunately, this isn’t something the politicians seem to understand.

Not improved

Posted on January 4 by backuphill

The first post of the new year is to let all of you know that nothing here has changed. The site is not “new and improved.” I am not new and improved. I don’t intended to make anything new or improve anything. Everything will stay the same and I will stay the same.

I am still grumpy.

I am still cantankerous.

I am still going to complain.

I am still irritable.

I am still shaking my head at all the BS around me.

I am still gonna Piss & Moan.

Have no fear, things around here aren’t going to change. So, as you read all these upbeat and overly optomistic posts on other sites about this looking (or hoping) like a better new year, just know you aren’ going to get any of that crap here.

Nothing is changing.

Hope is pointless since it will likely be dashed asap.

Just shrug your shoulders and keep trudging along.

Help those

Posted on December 6 by backuphill

Is the old saying, “Help those who can’t help themselves.” I have Googled it and several different versions or iterations come up for it.

I am tired.

Tired of helping those who nearly refuse to listen to reason and help themselves.

Once again, helping someone who has struggled all of their adult life, has a family, and continues to dream “pie in the sky” dreams even though the family would be homeless if not for the help of others.

“Get a full time job.” Good advice. Doesn’t matter what at this point and it really doesn’t matter how much it pays as long as it is brining in money that can be saved for the future and put to good use when the time comes. Instead, it is ignored for the idea that “starting my own business” is the better way to go – regardless of the fact that it has been pointed out time and time again that this goal should be a side gig until it can provide for the family on a full time basis. It has no benefits to start with. It has no healthcare. It is piecemeal at best for an income.

“Go visit Community Action to get some local ai started.” There is time in the day. Sure, the three youngest kids will have to be in tow to do it but it’s getting something started.

“Go visit DSHS. Get that process started.” Excuses about why it’s not possible at the moment.

This family has been living on state aid for years. This family has basically survived the last 7 months on pure charity from others, something to the tune (if roughly added together) would amount to probably about $40,000.

I am tired.

I am tired of helping someone that can’t or won’t help themselves.