Why fight?

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No need for combat shopping…

No need to brawl over anything. Just cough.

Need more space? Cough.

Want a little more “social distancing”? Cough.

Don’t wanna talk to people about their problems? Cough.

Suddenly, the cough has become the cure to society’s problems. Weird.

 

TP

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What the heck ya’ll doing?

I hope you aren’t one of those crazy people out there hoarding toilet paper for no damn reason! Seriously! Covid-19 ain’t got nothing to do with your pooper, people. You all are just going “5150” on us.

People fighting in the aisles of stores? Costco limiting purchases and having to hand out the TP? Empty store shelves wherever you go? Good grief people, TP isn’t gonna keep you from getting the virus and it sure as hell isn’t needed if you had the virus. All you really have done is create a black market for TP.

Ya’ll done “wiped” out the stores. I wish I was making this sh*t up. Get your mind “outta the toilet” and wash your hands instead. Let’s “flush” this nonsense asap.

See, now you got me all making puns for funs because people ain’t got the runs.

If you are one of those hoarders, STOP! Ain’t no poop emergency.

 

Cute dealers of addiction

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These are not Girl Scout cookies. Photo by Polina Tankilevitch on Pexels.com

It’s that time of year folks!

There are dealers of addiction in front of every store in the evenings and weekends and they are dressed in little brown uniforms with a green vest.

The Girl Scouts are pushing their addictive cookies again.

They stand there looking all cute, or sad, or whatever and ask if you would like to buy a box – or three.

When you finally relent and agree to buy one you somehow end up walking away with more because, you know, they’re only $5 a box (never mind the box is smaller, the cookies are smaller, and there are fewer in the box than there used to be).

Dang dealers of my cookie addiction.

Cold breeze

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Photo by Gabriela Palai on Pexels.com

I am not one to often complain about the temperature. I have, for most of my life, seemed to run at a higher temp than most so I don’t find myself shivering when it comes to “normal” temps. I am generally comfortable between 65-75 degrees.

Friday night, however, I found myself freezing, indoors, at a local restaurant. Red Robin might serve hot food, but the restaurant was cold enough to refrigerate food without a fridge. I am pretty sure the inside temp was only 7 degrees above the outside temp.

The outside temp was running somewhere around 43 degrees. It was windy and the rain was coming down in sheets – sideways. The walk from the car to the building was less than pleasant and I found the lower half of my body rather damp. The upper half was well shielded in my standard Helly Hansen jacket.

But, upon arriving at the table, my immediate comment to those there with me was that it was cold in the dining area. They agreed, as they had been sitting there for about 10 minutes waiting for everyone to arrive.

The rest of the evening, everyone was wearing jackets, sweaters, and shivering. Not exactly an inviting atmosphere for dining…

…or perhaps this cold temp was on purpose so that it would push people to leave sooner on a busy Friday night. If that’s the case, it is even more obnoxious. Upon checkout at their little computer thing, I did leave a review about the internal temp of the restaurant. Hopefully it caught someone’s attention.

Bah Humbug!

I don’t want to get up. I’m a Toys-R-Us kid…and Toys-R-Us really isn’t even a thing any more.

It’s too early and there are no toys under the tree for me.

There is no snow. This isn’t Christmas without snow.

Why is everyone making so much noise? I am trying to sleep in here.

Do we have any real food? I am tired of eating Christmas cookies and fudge for every meal and snack.

Put up the decorations…and tomorrow take them down. What a waste of time!

It’s a good thing Costco already has exercise equipment for sale. I can remind myself of what I should be doing, but won’t be.

Finally, the mall Christmas soundtrack can leave repeat and be given a rest. Three months of Christmas music is enough.


Got a “bah-humbug” phrase or statement to add? Share it in the comments.

False Advertising

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Photo by Nick Demou on Pexels.com

It’s really nice when a store advertises an item will be on sale and then when you go to the store to buy they don’t actually have it.

I went to Costco over the weekend to get an item that was in their sales flier that was good on items between Dec. 13-24th. It’s an item they have nearly all the time and its not an item that is in high demand – Wahl Clippers. I don’t believe there are that many people out there chomping at the bit to buy a set of these things (there are a bunch of long haired men running around these days, so I mean, come on…)

Anyway, I go to the usual place they are at the store and they are nowhere to be found. What I can find, however, is eight different types of electric toothbrushes and replacement heads and three different items for women’s hair styling. I check all the usual places for the clippers and I even check where they have a couple of men’s items on the end cap of the aisle. Nothing. Not anywhere.

Hmmm.

I ask. “We don’t have any in stock right now.” REALLY? You advertise it and then don’t have any? You normally have the item and you don’t have any? Something is fishy here!

I need a haircut and I am not about to pay to have someone buzz my hair for me. I keep it short. Like real short. It is probably about at 1/8th of an inch right now and that is too long!

Looks like I’ll be ordering from Amazon.