Host

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What do you do? How do you handle the situation?

So, one of the adult children wants to have their children’s (our grandchildren) birthday party at our house. They asked if that could happen at the end of the month.

Sounds simple, right? Sure, go ahead! We love you. We love them. No problem!

But there is history. There is always history.

They have done this once before. Asked if they could use the house and yard for a birthday party and we said that was fine. Very little communication with them between the ask and the event.

Day of the event comes and we find out it is a four hour “open house” where people can just drop in and hang out. 40 people show up (not including family and many of whom we don’t know) at various times during this open house. The kids, on a very limited budget, didn’t plan or budget for said party. They didn’t have enough supplies for said party. They didn’t have enough food for said party. They had no alternative plans for said party if the weather was crappy that day. They didn’t stick around long after the open house was over to clean up.

Guess who picked up all the slack, both in time and expense? I guess you don’t need to guess since you know it was us.

So, what do you do this time when they ask? Just let them do it, no questions asked? Or, do you put limitations on it? Do you set expectations, or do you just go with the flow?

Loaded questions, because you know how I would handle it (at least you should by now). But, the other person in the house doesn’t think it should be handled that way.

What is reasonable, logical, and practical?

Old sport

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Over the weekend I tried a sport/game (whatever you wanna classify it as) that I hadn’t really done since college. It’s a novel sport, as in it doesn’t enjoy widespread popularity but is becoming more and more popular. How do I know? Well, you are probably seeing these weird contraptions show up in public parks – a wire and chain basket on a pole.

Disc golf.

I had a friend in college who was an avid disc golf fan and he always managed to get a group of us out to go play with him. It was fun, but I wasn’t sure at the time that I really liked it.

I liked actual golf better. Let’s just say that.

Anyway, I had a friend invite me out for a round of disc golf over the weekend. I hadn’t really considered it, even though I am seeing those baskets all over the place now. So, I said yes.

We met at the park. There is a learning curve and technique to the game. But, I had fun. And it got me off the couch and outta the house. A win-win.

What I didn’t realize would happen is that I am an OLD sport, meaning that I am really sore today (two days after the fact). My arm and shoulder are not used to that motion and I am fully aware of those parts of my body today as they scream at me even while moving my arm to type.

Old.

The reality of being able to recover quickly from activity just isn’t the case any more. I miss those days. But, it’s reality today.

I am sport, just an old sport.

Uninvited

close up photography of bird nest

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OK, am I crazy here? Am I being unreasonable?

If you have guests staying in your home, do you think it is inappropriate for them to invite guests over to your house? Essentially, guests are inviting guests into your home.

Furthermore, what if all the guests are family?

So, some family is now living in my home for an undetermined amount of time. It’s been less than a week since this change. One of the conditions of moving in was that they were not allowed to have guests over, because having people in your space is one thing but then to have those people inviting strangers into your home because they are their friends, is just a whole other problem. This condition seemed to be understood.

Anyway, last night I overheard a conversation where the newly homed family members (in my home) were making plans with other family members who don’t exactly live nearby, but are within driving distance of their own home, to stay at the house. I believe the conversation went something like, “Well, you can come and hang out for the evening and we can probably find a place for you to crash. Driving home that late doesn’t make sense. I am sure we can find room. It’ll be fun. You can just go home the next day.

Excuse me? Fun for whom? Have you checked with me yet? Is this OK with me? You are making plans for me and my home without checking with me first. How is that OK? I mean, I have already altered my life to allow some family to stay in the house, do I really need to rearrange my life just so more family can stay in my house? Really?

Does it make a difference in this situation if the family members involved are your adult children and grandkids? One adult child has moved in with her 11 year old daughter. They are inviting our middle son and his family (wife, 3 boys under 7) to stay at the house too. Mind you, there is barely enough room for the people already staying in the house…

Am I crazy here? Am I being selfish?

I liked my nest empty. I want it back that way. That’s not to say I don’t love the kids and grandkids, but come on…it’s kind of the principle of the thing, isn’t it?

(Un)Invited

board game box business card

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Don’t you hate it when people don’t RSVP? What’s the deal?

In today’s day and age, there really isn’t any reason to not RSVP. There are so many different ways that invitations get set up and sent out that it really couldn’t be any more convenient.

I mean really. It seems everything is done through social media any more so when something is planned using one of the many different options available and all one has to do is hit the button to instantly respond, there really is no excuse.

Look at the invite date and time, look at your calendar, look at the invite again, and then press a button – Yes, Maybe, No.

It’s that freaking simple!

So, when you are planning something and you get little to no response it’s rather infuriating. Perhaps I just won’t invite any of them the next time.

Maybe it’s time for new friends and family…

RSVP means nothing

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Yep, I said it.

You used to be able to expect some courtesy out of people when planning something like a party or gathering or whatever. Because, after all, you are planning something you want an RSVP for.

Common courtesy has become something of a lost…concept…these days. In a world where “Hey you do you and I’ll do me” seems to fly but no one is really good at doing anything anymore. Everyone is just half-assing their way through life.

OK, to be fair. not everyone. There are still some responsible adults out there. I don’t want to over generalize, but you know what I mean.

Anyway, if you get a request for an RSVP – DO IT! Otherwise it wouldn’t have been asked for.

Just do it. (stupid Nike…)

“Hi, I’d like to RSVP for ______________”

It’s just the right thing to do.

 

I am a shoe person

black brown classic close up

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Ok, the title is (purposely) misleading. No, I am not the kind of guy that collects shoes just because they are cool or because I need one for every occasion. Read on for the explanation.

I was recently invited to a party. It was a gathering of about 40 people (adults and children) getting together to celebrate a special occasion and it was at the host’s home. they have a nice place and the carpet/floors are fairly new.

Usually when you go to their place the first thing you have to do when you get in the door is take off your shoes. This is rather irritating to me, for several reasons. One, I am a shoe person. I don’t like going barefoot and I don’t like just walking around in socks. Two, I am short so my pant legs either drag on the ground or I have to roll them up like a nerd waiting for a flood. Needless to say, it annoys me.

Anyway, I showed up and got to the front door and, sure enough, there were piles of shoes in the entry way. Dang it! Why invite hordes or people over and then make them take their shoes off?

I looked around. Hey, not everyone had their shoes off!

I didn’t remove mine. Because I am a rebel.

What do you think? Is the practice of asking your guests to take their shoes off OK or do you find it annoying too?